


Detour

by AgentOfShip



Series: Detour verse [2]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Brain Damage, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, a bit of angst, but not until much later, coffee shop AU, coffee shop AU with a twist, except Jemma never joined SHIELD, guest house AU, not a smut heavy fic, set around the beginning of season two
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-17
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2020-09-01 02:27:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 33,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20250652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgentOfShip/pseuds/AgentOfShip
Summary: Tired of recovery from his brain trauma not going fast enough, Fitz decides to take an extended leave of vacation from SHIELD to go home and see his mother. But when it turns out that spending all his days with his mother doesn't really help either, he goes for a drive and his car ends up breaking down next to the cutest coffee shop and guest house in Perthshire. So he thinks maybe a change of scenery would do him some good and it only has a little to do with the muffin baking angel of a woman managing the place.Set around the beginning of season two except Jemma didn't join SHIELD.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'd by the wonderful @LibbyWeasley who made this so much nicer to read for you :)  
This story was started last summer and I finally managed to get back to working on it, hope you'll enjoy it :)  
Ten chapters planned, six already written. Updates about once a week (unless I manage to write the last chapters faster :))

Driving was nice. Ironically, it had been one of the only skills that came back easily after the accident (if such a word really applied.) It was strange because it had never been especially important to him before, merely a practical way to go from one place to another. But it was a good thing because being coddled and cared for by his mother like the toddler he had barely ever been anyway (after all he'd started fixing appliances in the house before he was old enough to go to school), was something he wasn’t good at. Of course, he should have known from the start that it wouldn't work. 

After months of encouraging words and helpful gestures from his friends and co-workers mixed with looks of pity that seemed to mean that they didn't truly believe he'd ever be the same again, he'd snapped. He had decided to use whatever sick days and vacation days he had left, if it even meant anything now anyway, packed his laptop and whatever clothes he could find, and left for the airport. Once there, he'd taken the first flight home he could find, not even caring about how insanely expensive it was. The first week at his mum's house had been nice. The small country house just outside of Glasgow had given him the peace and quiet he felt like he needed and, at first, his mum had been surprisingly respectful of his will not to talk and be alone. But being the loving mother that she was, she had soon started to try and help him, insisting on talking a lot to improve his speech, and asking him to fix things he knew she'd broken on purpose. And that was when he realized the mistake he had made. He could never be left alone in his mother's house, she would always take care of him and look at him worryingly, and that wasn't what he needed at the moment. So he had just ended up feeling like an ungrateful little shite for wanting to snap at her all the time. Because surely, if there was one thing he hadn't lost in the accident, it was his bad temper. If anything, being frustrated all the time had only made it worse.

So he'd started driving around aimlessly every time he was on the verge of snapping again, and it felt good. Because when he did, he was in complete control, his hand didn't shake as much, and he didn't have to talk, just focus on turning the wheel and stepping on the pedals when needed. Maybe it was also because he'd bought that ugly little car for next to nothing and fixed it himself, giving him a sense of accomplishment for the first time in months, however small it was for someone who'd already designed planes. So earlier that day, when his mum had driven him to his wits' ends by insisting he eat more (like having more soup really was the secret to fixing brain damage!), he'd grabbed his wallet and phone and hopped in his car. At first, he had vaguely followed the road leading to town, but when he realized he really didn't want to have to deal with traffic, he'd just started taking any road that was small enough to be mostly deserted, the signs becoming a blur on the side of the road as he passed them at full speed. With his brain hashing out all the same memories and frustrations and things he wished he'd done differently over and over again, time passed quickly, so quickly that he didn't even notice the landscape changing around him. That was, until the car started sputtering before slowly coming to a full stop as he, fortunately, still had the reflex to pull to the side of the road. In retrospect, maybe he should have given that blinking light on the dashboard the attention it deserved. 

"Fuuuuck! Bloody fucking hell!" he cried out as he let his head fall back against the headrest. The good thing was that, at least here, no one would glare at him for his bad temper and filthy mouth (sometimes he wished all words came as easily as curse words) because he was quite clearly in the middle of nowhere. He grabbed his phone from the passenger seat to see how much he'd have to walk to get to the nearest gas station, but of course, OF COURSE, he was out of battery as well. He had one of the only phones in the world equipped with his modified battery, able to last up to thirty days without being recharged. The thing probably hadn't been turned off in two years, and it still chose this day, out of all days, to finally die. Maybe he should accept his terrible fate, Fitz thought. Maybe he wasn't supposed to survive that accident after all, and the cosmos was just trying to set things right. 

After two minutes of wallowing in self pity though, Fitz opened his eyes. He had to admit, although it was the middle of nowhere, it looked like a nice middle of nowhere. He seemed to be at the edge of a dense little wood and there were soft green hills and blue sky as far as the eye could see. With the light breeze he could feel through the open window of his car and the rather loud singing of birds, it didn't feel like the kind of place the universe would chose to let someone die. Was it Perthshire? It looked like Perthshire. And he'd certainly driven long enough to get there. In that case, he could probably wait in his car and some nice passersby would stop by at some point and offer him to get him to the nearest gas station and back to his car. 

But Fitz felt like he'd been standing still for too long already so he took his useless phone and wallet and got out of the car. He could at least walk to the point where the road started going down towards the valley and see if there was a gas station nearby, or any sign of human occupation where he could find a phone or someone to help him.

It took him no more than fifteen minutes to get there and, even though the village, and most likely the gas station, seemed pretty far to go there on foot, there was a house just down the hill next to a lake. Or maybe it was a farm since there seemed to be at least three buildings, it was hard to tell from afar and with all the trees. He hesitated for a moment because he'd never been the most sociable person, even before the accident and from how remote the place was, it felt like the person living there might not be too keen on having surprise visitors. But well, he supposed he could at least try. What was the worst that could happen? No one had ever heard of a serial killer living in the Scottish countryside, right?

As he got closer, he could see that it was definitely not a farm. There was a nice little cottage at the end of a short driveway, very picturesque with all the flowers around it and the lake behind, although it had seen better days. To the right and half hidden under the trees, there was another, smaller house that looked to be the kind you'd build to welcome a family too big to fit into the main house. It seemed to be in an even worse state than the main house but he quite liked it for some reason. It looked a little like the old elf or witches' houses from the stories his mom used to tell him when he was young enough to still believe in them. And finally, there was another building that looked like an old shed. Except there were even more flowers around it and a pretty colorful sign that said "Detour, tea, coffee & lunch". Fitz smiled. He had to admit the name was pretty fitting. There were also a few tables and chairs outside along with big flower patterned beach umbrellas prettily set up in front of the shop windows.

"Beach umbrellas in Scotland…" Fitz thought with a light chuckle. "Someone's optimistic!" 

Taking a deep breath, because talking to someone was always a struggle these days, but with the reassurance that, at least, he wouldn't be bothering someone in their home, Fitz took the last few steps, opened the door, and walked in what looked like his mom's living room turned into a cafe. His eyes went wide as he took in his surroundings. There was an overabundance of flower patterns and pastel colors everywhere, and most of the furniture looked like it had been taken out of a doll house and enlarged to human scale. 

"Uh hi…" Fitz let out a little nervously when he couldn't find a single living being, customer, waiter or otherwise. Or at least he hoped nothing was alive. Because the eyes in the portraits on the wall certainly seemed to follow his every movement and it was making him a little uncomfortable. 

"I'll be with you in a moment!" 

The words came from somewhere behind the counter in a terribly cheerful and, if he wasn't mistaken, English accent from Sheffield. Could he really have driven that far south without realizing it? 

There was a bit of a commotion coming from what looked to be the kitchen and, a minute later, the woman attached to the cheerful voice walked out of the room and came to stand behind the counter Fitz was leaning against. 

"Sorry!" she quipped. "Some of the kitchen appliances are misbehaving and-Oh hello!" she cut herself off, blushing a bit as she tilted her head to the side to look at him, probably realizing she wasn't supposed to tell clients these kinds of things, and flashed him a bright smile. 

Considering the flower pattern on her dress as well, she definitely had that weird love for flowers in common with his mom, but other than that, she definitely looked nothing like his mom. First of all, she was much younger, about his age probably, with chocolate waves stopping just above her shoulders, sparkling hazel eyes and a pale complexion that probably explained the need for beach umbrellas, even in the dim sunlight of Perthshire. Oh and yeah, also, she was quite possibly the prettiest thing he'd seen in a long time. She actually looked like she'd also just come out of one of those books about Scottish folklore.

"What can I do for you?" she asked and he realized he'd been looking at her, and definitely not talking, for an awkwardly long moment. Of course, he'd never been good when it came to talking to people before but since the accident, and taking into consideration that she was a very attractive woman, it would be a miracle if he managed to blurt out even one coherent sentence. So he just let out the first one that took form in his brain. 

"Where am I?" 

"Uh Detour's coffee shop," she replied, quickly looking around like she needed to make sure she hadn't been transported into another dimension populated with strange idiots who didn't even know where they were. Her bright smile was slowly turning into a confused frown.

"Uh no… I-I mean larger, like a-a… town? Which town?" God, maybe he should have waited on the side of the road after all. 

"Oh!" she exclaimed, her smile turning wider again. "Almondbank. Perthshire." 

"Oh. Thought so but then you… uh… talked and--"

"Of course, obviously I'm not from around here," she finished for him. "I bought this place from a lovely old lady who went to live in Edinburgh to be closer to her family," she explained before another, more amused smile made its way back on her face.

"But the question is how did _you_ end up here? Did you get teleported or something? Oh no I know! Are you from the future?" she asked enthusiastically, and he chuckled. 

Couldn't she stop being so perfect?

He looked down, pinching the bridge of his nose like he always did when he was frustrated. He wished he could reply with another clever joke like he would have done before. Even maybe try awkwardly flirting with her like his younger, much more hopeful self, would have done, but it was all just too much effort now. He'd never had much going for him before, but at least he had his brain. But now… he knew the data was here, he just couldn't seem to get it out of his head and into words.

"Ha no. See hum… car broke down, no gas... phone's dead," he said, taking the useless device out of his pocket to show her the black screen. "And hu… I didn't really… hum…"

God, some days, he felt like he could recite his old graduation speech without a hitch and others, he just couldn't come up with the simplest words. 

"Paid attention to the signs?" she finished for him and he sighed in relief. 

"Yeah-yeah that!" 

She looked like she was about to ask more questions, looking at him with those bright eyes and, somehow, making him feel like he was being observed under a microscope. After all, it was a pretty weird thing to do, driving around aimlessly. But she just shook her head and gave him another, softer smile.

"So, maybe I can help with the car. I keep a petrol can in the garage just in case. Where's your car?" 

"Hu maybe one and a half mile that way, two miles tops," he said, pointing in the direction of the woods for lack of more precise information to give to her. "So hum… I could hu… buy the can from you if you don't mind or I-I can borrow it and I'll fill it up at the nearest hu--"

"Gas station?"

"Yeah. And bring it back." 

"Oh no don't worry, I'll fill it up next time I go for gas myself. No need to drive all these extra miles for nothing!" She said cheerfully as she started walking back towards the kitchen. "Just give me a few minutes to close and I'll drive you to your car."

"Oh no, no, no, that's not… that won't be necessary, I can walk," he protested. Actually, it seemed like walking was one of the only few other things he could do properly these days. 

"Oh no, don't be ridiculous, it'll only take me five minutes to get there and I think all my many customers can do without me for that long!" she said, making some kind of a mix between a smile and a grimace and he couldn't help chuckling. That was rather adorable. 

"Oh! Alright then, thank you." 

The idea of spending five minutes in a car with someone he barely knew was making him a little nervous, but at the same time, her bright smile and the fact that she insisted on driving him in the middle of her workday, having obviously noticed his inability to speak properly, made his heart beat faster in excitement as well. He knew she was just being nice, but there was something about her that he liked. Something new and familiar at the same time, like meeting an old friend after a very long time. Like he knew they would get along again past the awkward phase.

"No problem... " she replied, letting the words die down as she looked at him expectantly. 

"Fitz!" He finally let out when he realized what she'd been waiting for, and she smiled. Again. He wasn't used to provoking such genuinely friendly reactions from anyone, especially these past few months. People usually looked at him like he was weird or even dangerous because of his mood swings, or when they knew how he used to be, with a look of pity.

"Nice to meet you Fitz, I'm Jemma," she replied, walking back towards him to extend her right hand for him to shake. Which he did. With his left hand, the good one that didn't shake all the time and wouldn't make her feel like he wanted to tear her arm off, which made for a pretty awkward handshake. But she didn't say anything and just scrunched up her nose in amusement before letting go. Making her smile, even if it was because he was a little strange, that he could live with. It was much better than pity or fear.

"Nice to meet you too and hu thanks… again." 

"Oh don't mention it really, makes my day a bit more interesting!" she quipped before walking back to the kitchen. 

People seemed to find him weird these days, but mostly in a moody-weird-stuttering-guy way and, certainly not in an interesting way. Maybe this poor woman was getting bored here in the middle of Perthshire. Or maybe, just maybe, she was a bit of an odd bird herself and she just knew that inability to talk didn't mean inability to think. 

Or maybe he was just reading too much into it, and she was just really nice. 

"So, hum, you bought the place recently?" he asked, loud enough for her to hear through the door. It wasn't like him to make small talk, but not talking to someone face to face helped him relax and something in her attitude made it easier somehow. Maybe it was the ease with which she managed to finish his sentences, as simple as they were. Or it could be because there was that strangely familiar thing in her voice that felt soothing, and in any case, much nicer than the one inside his head that sounded a lot like his father and did nothing to help his progress.

"Yeah!" she replied, her voice muffled by the door separating them. "Business is a bit slow for now, but I'm hopeful it'll get better soon! Maybe some tourists come July." 

"Well it does look… nice. Very flowery," he said, wincing at his own choice of words. 

"Bit creepy isn't it?" she asked, just passing her head through the door and smirking at him. 

"Oh no! I think it looks hu… lovely," he protested, smiling sheepishly when she raised a disbelieving eyebrow.

"Haven't had the time to redecorate yet. I mean, I love flowers but it's a bit too much yeah? And those paintings… I could swear they follow my every move!" she said, shaking her head like a shiver had just run down her spine and this time, he laughed for real. A real uninhibited bout of laughter and it felt amazing. He couldn't remember the last time it had happened. He wasn't even sure it had happened at all since the accident. 

"I'll just be a minute," she added, grinning at him before disappearing into the kitchen again.

Left to his own devices, Fitz started pacing, looking around the place as he did. Obviously the old lady's tastes were still very present with the rose and thistle patterns on the wallpaper, as well as the paintings of old-timey ladies and tiny embroidered doilies everywhere. But as he looked more closely, it felt like Jemma had started making her mark as well. The menus on the tables looked like they'd been designed fairly recently with a tasteful and more sober look to them than the rest of the place. Not to mention that the cakes on the menus and in the display window were clearly the creations of a young woman and not an old lady. She offered choices that seemed to cater for every possible form of diet or food restriction, which Fitz found really thoughtful and only confirmed the opinion he'd managed to form of her after only a few minutes. And there were also some quite unusual and daring flavors, like that basil and strawberry cake, which didn't look like something an old Scottish lady would have offered in her cafe. And as his eyes travelled back towards the counter, they stopped on a small sign next to the cash register. 

It said: "Guest house for rent next to the cafe. Breakfast included. Reasonable price. Ask owner for more information."

Oh. A whole house all to himself in the middle of nowhere? That actually sounded a lot like what he'd really come back home for and he did have quite a lot of savings he could use to pay for rent for a little while. Of course, Jemma most likely lived right next to it (if it was in fact the small house under the trees he'd seen earlier) but she seemed to be really polite and well-mannered. Surely she wouldn't intrude on him too much. And anyway, if he stayed with his mom much longer he was going to end up saying something he'd regret, and if he found himself a house with really no one around, there was a chance he might become a complete hermit, and that would surely not improve his ability to speak. So, maybe, having someone new around could actually be good for him. Someone who didn't have any preconceived notion of how he was supposed to be, someone who made him feel good about himself with only a few simple words and warm smiles and well, obviously someone who made change and novelty feel just a tiny bit more exciting than terrifying. And since he'd immediately liked that house, maybe it was a sign the cosmos did have a plan for him after all, but maybe not the one Fitz had first imagined. And considering that it felt like he'd already made the decision without saying a word out loud, he supposed he should at least ask.

"Hu Jemma? Is that guest house of yours still available?"


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning, Fitz packed his bags, which consisted of the small suitcase he brought home from the US and the huge travel bag filled with all the basic things he didn't think to pack and had to buy again in Glasgow, and was on the road before the bulk of the morning traffic. Surprisingly, his mum hadn't taken the news so terribly. Probably because even she realized that he wasn't making as much progress as he should and, also, most likely because she knew she only had a two hour drive to get to her son in case he needed her. He wouldn't admit it but he found that fact reassuring as well. 

-0-0-0- 

The guest house was much nicer from the inside than it was from the outside. The flowered wallpaper had only invaded one of the two bedrooms, the rest of the house was a slightly boring but neutral beige and there wasn't a single creepy painting in sight. He had a nice living room with a small attached kitchen and a big wooden table he'd use mostly to work on. Jemma had been super enthusiastic when she'd shown him the nice, not creepy paintings she had bought to bring a touch of colour and modernity to the house. She'd looked so adorable running around the place like a tiny flower tornado to show him each and every one of them, that he hadn't had the heart to tell her he was more interested in knowing if that nice looking TV was 4K. He could easily look it up himself later and instead focus on pretending to have an opinion on the paintings that didn't stop at "Well, there's certainly a lot of red on that one". The house really had everything he needed on top of being close to a cafe that sold all sorts of delicious cakes. He'd felt obligated to buy at least one the previous day, considering she was closing the cafe for him, and had decided to buy three more muffins to bring home after the first bite (only one actually made it home). And maybe he'd imagined it all, or it was just wishful thinking, but what definitely sold him was the fact that she'd seemed especially enthusiastic that he'd be the one renting the house. 

On the first day, he tried getting to work on one of the designs he'd started a few weeks after the accident but couldn't seem to be able to finish. But even with the relaxing atmosphere of the house and no one to put pressure on him, he couldn't seem to be able to focus for more than five minutes. And when he tried to work on his fine motor skills by taking apart one of the small devices he'd been allowed to bring with him, his bad hand started shaking and he had to stop before his temper got the best of him and he threw it all out the window. The voice in his head constantly telling him that it was useless to keep trying and he'd never be his old self again was getting louder. So since he knew it didn't help to answer it, and it was such a beautiful day to be surrounded by the prettiest landscape in the world, he went out for a walk. He walked almost eight miles and came back exhausted but much calmer. This time, it took him only a few extra minutes to put the device back together, and he rewarded himself with pizza and video games. After all, Mack was the one who insisted it helped take his mind off things and work on his fine motor skills at the same time.

The next day, he didn't even try to work first thing in the morning and went out for another walk in the other direction. This time, he didn't feel like taking apart and put back together the same useless devices he'd been taking apart for weeks at his mum's house, so he gathered pieces of wood during his walk and used one of his cutter knives to shape them into small monkeys. They didn't look too good, but considering he didn't have the proper tool and still didn't cut himself even with his bad hand shaking a bit at some point, he decided it wasn't so bad. 

The day after that, he put on the sweat pants and running shoes he bought in Glasgow in a fit of optimism and hadn't used yet, and decided to go for a run. He had to stop and take a breather after less than three miles but it was still the longest he'd ever run without anyone chasing after him, and he silently thanked Mack who insisted he should work out because regaining control of his whole body would help him regain control of his brain. He managed to run almost all the way back home, and after a shower and a huge plate of pasta, he finally got to work. Come sunset, he had a complete first draft for that non-lethal gun design he'd been working on for so long. Later, he went to sleep exhausted but hopeful for the first time in a long time. 

That night, he also slept better than he had since he woke up from the coma, with no nightmare to wake him up in the middle of the night, and no crippling panic during the first few minutes after waking up like had happened so often since the accident. He'd wonder where he was, especially if the room was completely dark like on base, and how much time he'd been asleep, terrified that he'd lost another nine days or more. But not that night. On the contrary, he woke up well rested, in a happy, hopeful mood and absolutely famished. And that was why, for the first time since he'd started renting this house, he decided to go to the cafe and collect on that free breakfast Jemma had insisted he would get it every morning if he wanted to. It wasn't that he didn't want it or didn't want to see Jemma before, quite the contrary in fact. But talking to people was still the scariest thing to him, and he didn't want to disappoint her or himself if he wasn't able to make at least small talk with that lovely young woman who brought a smile to his face just thinking about her. 

But if he was going to work on his ability to speak, he had to actually talk to people. And that sweet, patient woman, who had no idea how easily words used to come to him, seemed like a good choice. And the longer he waited before going there and talking to her, the weirder it would get when he finally did. So capitalizing on his hopefulness and good mood, he got out of bed earlier than usual, took a quick shower and walked towards the cafe. The place wasn't supposed to open for another hour but Jemma had told him that she was always there at least two or three hours before opening to start on the cakes of the day and would leave the door open if he wanted to come in for breakfast. 

"Hello?" Fitz said, hopefully loud enough for Jemma to hear since she was most likely in the kitchen.

He heard noises coming from the kitchen, someone mumbling, possibly even cursing, and then footsteps coming his way before the door opened and Jemma came out, a bright smile tugging at her lips the moment she saw him. 

"Oh, hi Fitz!" she let out a little breathless. "It's nice to see you." 

Despite her perfect smile, it didn't look like things were going exactly her way in the kitchen. Actually, it looked like she had a food fight in there because she had flour up to her forehead and all over her clothes despite the apron she was wearing over it, and her cheeks were flushed red. Fitz couldn't help grinning back. 

"Nice to see you too but hum… is-is… everything alright in there?" he asked, nodding towards the kitchen. 

"Oh yeah of course!" she started, almost as a reflex it seemed before scrunching up her nose and correcting herself. "I mean no, obviously, my stupid electric stand mixer broke and I can't find what's wrong with it!" She nodded towards the device half taken apart on one of the cafe tables. "So I have to do everything by hand and it's taking much longer than I thought and well, obviously, it's a lot messier," she finished sheepishly.

He found it interesting that she even tried to take the thing apart and see what was wrong. Most people would have just thrown it away and bought a new one. 

"Do you want me to take a look at it?" 

"Oh no don't worry, I'll take care of it later or just buy a new one, that thing's ancient anyway," she replied, shaking her head. "So d'you want breakfast?" 

"Hu yeah but if you're- you're…" He closed his eyes a second to find the proper word. "… busy, I can come back later."

"Oh no, don't worry, it's not like I usually get a huge crowd in the morning anyway!" she replied, rolling her eyes good-naturedly. "So what do you want? I can cook you a full English breakfast or just toast or pancakes…"

"Would you judge me if had one or two of those chocolate muffins for breakfast?" he asked with a slightly shy smile, and she grinned at him. 

"I wouldn't dare judge my one and only client!" she said, putting her hand over her chest in mock offense. "Especially not when he conveniently asks for something I only need to put on a plate," she added with a knowing smile. 

"But they're really… good, been thinking about them a lot since the last time," he replied, and that only made her smile wider. Sure, he wouldn't have minded a full English breakfast since his breakfast had consisted of way too sugary cereals for the last few days but those muffins really were delicious. Delicious! That was the word he'd been looking for. And if he could make her life a little easier and have more of her lovely smiles coming his way, then he supposed it was all worth it. 

"Alright then!"

A few minutes later, she came back with two muffins, a large cup of tea with milk and sugar on the side, along with a small plate of fruit he didn't ask for but didn't dare question the presence of.

"I have to go back to the kitchen but ask if you need anything. Or, you know, shout really loud if you actually want me to hear you!" she said and he chuckled. 

He gulped down the two muffins and the plate of fruit embarrassingly fast but fortunately Jemma was too busy in the kitchen to witness what was most likely a less than appealing scene. And in his defense, he'd been too exhausted to make dinner the previous night, and had felt too guilty to order pizza once more. After that, he wondered for a moment if he should just go back home and find some excuse to come back to the cafe later, and hopefully manage to find something to talk about with Jemma other than breakfast. But then his gaze was attracted to the piece of machinery torn apart on the table on the other side of the room. She'd said she didn't need him to take a look at it but he supposed she was just being polite and had no reason to think he'd be better at fixing it than she was anyway. His fingers were almost itching to touch it and see what was wrong with it. It was a habit he'd developed when he was too young to even remember, especially now that his older memories tended to get a little jumbled. But he'd designed planes and fixed holotables, surely he could fix a recalcitrant mixer. And it was all taken apart anyway, he couldn't make it worse. And it could be a nice and helpful way to exercise his fine motor skills today instead of playing video games or uselessly taking apart the same device once more. 

-0-0-0-

Turned out it was an easy fix, but one that was easy to miss he supposed. One of the wires was damaged but on a place that was covered by the little piece of plastic holding it together with another wire. The piece of plastic being useless anyway, Fitz just had to go back to his place, grab his cutting pliers, cut the useless piece of plastic along with damaged part of the wire and hook it back where it was supposed to go. Before he realized it, the whole device was put back together and it's only when it was finished and he sat at the table rather pleased with himself that Fitz noticed his bad hand hadn't shaken at all for the past few minutes.

"Hu Fitz?" 

Jemma's voice startled him, as focused as he was, and he literally jumped out of his chair. 

"Hu sorry, couldn't help myself! Should work hum... prop-properly now," he said with a sheepish smile. 

"You mean you fixed it?" she asked, raising her eyebrows, a tentative smile tugging at her lips. 

"Yeah that's-I'm a… hum" Ugh, of all the words he could forget about, it had to be his own damn job. "That's what I do," he finished with a sigh. 

"You fix kitchen appliances?" she asked unconvincingly, and he chuckled humorlessly. Yeah, he supposed that was what he did now. 

"No hum... I make things, design them, and usually, not-not for the kitchen." Planes, super advanced non lethal weaponry, really cool spy gadgets. Yep, those words he had and he was most likely not allowed to tell her. 

"Oh you're an engineer!" she cried out enthusiastically, her eyes lighting up at the realization, and he sighed in relief. 

"Yeah… that," he simply replied with a small smile she quickly reciprocated. But she was biting her lip and looking at him with her head tilted to the side, and he knew exactly why. Of course, Jemma was obviously far from stupid and she seemed sweet and caring, she must have noticed that there had to be something wrong with him if he wasn't even able to say his own job. Not to mention how he didn't elaborate on the kinds of things he usually designed. But apparently he'd been right about her when he thought she wouldn't be the kind to be nosy because, once more, she just shook her head and her smile turned brighter. 

"Well, thanks so much for that Fitz, you're a lifesaver!" she let out enthusiastically as she walked towards him. Ironically, back when his brain wasn't so useless, he'd designed objects that did save people's lives but had never been on the receiving end of such heartfelt gratitude. She seemed to hesitate once more, looking at him with a strange expression, almost like she was studying him -she tended to do that a lot and he wondered if it was just her thing or if it was specific to him- and then, just tentatively squeezed his arm before softly thanking him again. 

Up close, he realized that what he'd taken for a shadow on her cheek was in fact chocolate and he couldn't help grinning. It really was messier when she had to do everything by hand. 

"Hu Jemma you have hum…" he started, pointing to his own cheek as he desperately struggled for words. " …chocolate here."

"Oh!" she let out blushing slightly as she tried to wipe it off. 

"No, the other one," he corrected her, and when she finally found the right spot, she only managed to smear it over her cheekbone a little bit more.

"Better?" she asked and if she didn't look so innocent, he'd thought she did it on purpose to make him laugh, which of course was even funnier, and he bit his cheek not to laugh out loud as he shook his head. 

"Do you mind if I..." he trailed off, tentatively lifting his good hand to bring it closer to her face. 

"No, alright, go ahead," she half whispered. 

So as gently as possible, he palmed her cheek, making her face turn slightly away from him and towards the light. Which didn't stop him from noticing that her eyes were in fact not simply brown, but had specs of green and gold that gave them more of a honey color overall, which was really quite lovely. Shaking his head as he realized he shouldn't let his fingers linger over her face for so long and make her uncomfortable, he used his index finger to wipe the chocolate off her face in one swift movement and brought it to his mouth to lick it off. 

His eyes went wide almost immediately, realizing what he'd just done. 

"Oh my god! I don't-I… don't know why I-I did that." 

What was wrong with him? You just didn't lick chocolate off your fingers after wiping it off someone's face! Especially someone you barely knew and who was definitely going to take you for some kind of weirdo now!

"Fitz that's—" she started but he cut her off.

"So sorry! Just looked so hum… tempting. You... " Oh bloody hell, now was not the time to mix all his words! "No no no no no not-not you… the chocolate, could never resist it but-but… Oh god!" he finally let out, dramatically taking his head in his hands, glad that there wasn't a wall too close to him or he might have been tempted to hit his head against it. 

But as he was waiting for her to move as far away as she could from the weirdo in front of her, she burst out laughing. Even as obsessed as he was on what a fool he made of himself, he couldn't help noticing how pretty that sound was. And then, her hand was on his shoulder and the soft, playful tone of her voice forced him to look up. 

"Fitz! It's alright really, it's not like you licked it right off my face. _That_ would have been weird!" She grinned and he groaned as he felt his cheeks grow even hotter as the image flashed quite clearly in his head. "Can't blame you really, that chocolate icing IS quite irresistible if I say so myself," she added, and he really wanted to glare at her for making fun of his misery, but there was something equally irresistible about her smile and he just couldn't help but smile back. 

"Come on then," she said, giving his shoulder one last squeeze before letting go. "Let's see how well you fixed that mixer!" 

Grabbing said mixer, she turned around and walked back towards the kitchen with that cute bounce in her step he'd noticed on day one. He felt like he really had no choice but to follow her, but it was a little weird going past the counter. He was a client after all, he wasn't supposed to go back there. When he stopped in front of the kitchen door though, she turned around and let out a small chuckle. 

"Come on in Fitz, it's my kitchen, not my super secret lair!" she said with a teasing grin and it was his time to chuckle as he walked in and closed the door behind him.

"But do you have one?"

"Have one what?" she asked, frowning in slight confusion. 

"Secret lair?" he grinned. 

"Well I'm not really supposed to tell you if I do, right?" she grinned back before walking to the other side of the room to plug the mixer into the electric socket on the wall.

"So you're not denying it," he mumbled more to himself than her, but she heard him anyway and turned back to flash him another wide amused smile before turning the mixer on, squeaking in delight when the whip started turning just like it was supposed to. 

"That's fantastic Fitz, it's going to save me so much time today, really, " she said as she turned back to him. He smiled softly at her and gave her a nod in response, and that seemed to be enough for her, which he was infinitely grateful for. It was good for him to force himself to talk to someone, but trying to explain himself and not finding the words a few minutes earlier had drained him and he felt like he needed to rest a bit. 

After washing her hands, Jemma went back to baking and it was fascinating to watch. She didn't seem to hesitate for a second as she took out ingredients from cabinets and drawers, as everything was neatly labelled and classified with what seemed to be an ingenious system. Ingredients were divided in several big groups and then logically classified alphabetically inside those groups. Most of those ingredients along with other, more unusual ones, were stored in a separate cabinet over what seemed to be another completely separate mini kitchen and he quickly understood that it was where she baked everything that was something-free. She took out ingredients following the little recipe cards above the counter and weighed them precisely before putting them in the mixing bowl very carefully. Fitz thought there was something almost scientific in the way she did all that, like every gesture was of vital importance and he found that it was strangely soothing to him. After a few minutes though, Fitz realized he was there observing her without saying a word, and even though that didn't seem to bother her, her mind apparently completely focused on what she was doing, he thought it might be weird at some point and make her uncomfortable.

"Well you're all set now, I should hum, leave you to it." 

"I don't mind the company if you-if you want to stay," she replied, smiling up at him before looking back down to where she was now preparing a muffin tin while the mixer took care of mixing all of the ingredients together. "Plus, the way you eat those, watching them be baked must be like porn to you!"

Fitz choked on his own saliva and he could feel his face draining as he watched Jemma turn an interesting shade of beet red in the corner of his field of vision. She said the words distractedly, almost like it escaped her mouth without her brain realizing it until it was too late. 

"If you-you… say that because of hu-hu..." God he was losing his words again, so for lack of a better option, he pointed out in the vague direction of where they stood earlier. "I swear there wasn't anything-anything hum… sec-sec..." Well to be fair, these kinds of words, he wouldn't have been able to say properly before the accident in such a situation.

"No, no, no, no, Fitz I'm so so so sorry, you just seem to like those muffins so much, which is super flattering really, especially since I haven't been doing that for very long. Don't know why I said it like that, that was so completely out of line!" She'd walked towards him and was now blocking the door, consciously or not, like she was scared he would just run away. She seemed too embarrassed to look at him though and was hiding her face in her hands. "This is so embarrassing, you're being so lovely fixing my mixer without me even asking, and I come out with this and make you uncomfortable, I must be getting crazy living here and spending more time with these bloody creepy paintings than with human beings, I can't even control the words that come out of my mouth anymore!"

Well, we make quite the pair, Fitz thought. I can't seem to make half the words leave my head and she can't stop them. And with that thought, he burst out laughing. 

"Jemma stop!" he said through his laughter and she looked up at him, an expression of slight hurt that he would dismiss her apologies like that. "It's fine really, I guess we're even now, yeah?" he said, nodding towards the cafe's main room hoping she'd understand. 

"Really?" she ended up asking, tentatively looking up at him with her hands still on both sides of her face. 

"Yeah and hum, the cakes are really delicious and it was kind of funny," he said, and she adorably scrunched up her nose in slight disbelief. "Just maybe… too soon?" he let out tentatively, and she chuckled as she seemed to understand what he meant. 

"Yeah got it. Keep the inappropriate jokes for when we know each other better!"

Apparently deciding that it was safe to move away from the door and that he wasn't going to run away just now, she walked back to the kitchen counter and grabbed the tray of cupcakes cooling on a higher shelf and then went to the fridge and took out a bowl from it. Turning to Fitz, she opened her mouth but apparently changed her mind and took out a pastry bag and tip from a drawer under the counter. But then she seemed to change her mind again and put it down again. 

"Everything alright?" 

"Yeah yeah! hum it's just... " She started wringing her hands together, looking embarrassed once more. "I'm not so sure about this icing and I wanted to ask you to taste it for me, but now it feels a little weird," she let out in a small voice as she looked at him in apprehension. Fitz couldn't help grinning. Then she grinned back and soon it turned into full blown laughter. 

In the end, Fitz did taste the icing, which was absolutely fantastic, and Jemma went back to her muffins and cupcakes. Fitz stayed a little longer. They didn't talk much and most of it was Jemma explaining her process for creating recipes, which only confirmed his idea that there was a whole scientific feel to it. But he still managed to get a few words in, most of it without stuttering. He went home when the cafe opened officially and customers started coming in, and for a moment he just sat on the couch with a smile that just wouldn't leave his face. Because, for once, he did himself a favor and didn't focus on how he made a fool of himself. Instead ,he focused on the fact that he made her laugh and that she seemed confident they would know each other better at some point, and that she genuinely enjoyed his company. Also, he would gladly fix her whole house if that got her to call him lovely again.


	3. Chapter 3

Fitz didn't even notice it had gone dark outside until he was startled out of his daze by the sound of a knock on the door. He looked through the window to try and see who it could be and only saw the deep blue sky and more and more stars as his eyes adjusted. Standing up from where he was hunched over the sketch that had taken him the better part of the afternoon, he stretched out his back then went to open the door. 

"Hi," Jemma said a little shyly the moment he opened it, and a smile tugged at his lips. Which had apparently become a reflex upon seeing her face. She'd let her hair down since he saw her in the morning, and she looked absolutely lovely like that. She'd also put on a big wooly sweater over her t-shirt and that reminded him of how much he had missed the seasons in Scotland when he was back in the US. Even on a warm early summer day like today, where you could go out without a jacket, enjoy the sun or even go swimming in the nearby lake, it was always cool enough at night to allow wearing a sweater and enjoy a nice cup of tea before diving under the covers for a good night’s sleep. Before he got completely lost in this nice mental image, Jemma supposed that his smile was an invitation for her to say more about her presence at the moment, and cleared her throat before speaking.

"So hum, I had a few leftover muffins at the cafe and thought I'd bring them to you! But then I remembered that you already had those for breakfast and I felt guilty for only feeding you sugar today. And it was really sweet of you to fix my mixer, so since I wanted lasagna and salad but it felt silly cooking something like that only for myself, I thought I'd make enough for two and bring some to you," she trailed off with a slightly nervous smile. 

But then she must have mistaken his slightly stunned silence and inability to express with words how adorable he thought she was being with something else because she started speaking again, a frown creasing her forehead. 

"But I only now realize that, maybe, you already had dinner or you might not even like lasagna so I'll just freeze the rest of it and you can still keep the muffins for--"

"No no no!" he cut her off, finally finding his voice and wincing at how loud and weird that sounded. "I mean yes, muffins would be nice but hum, la-la-lasagna too. Didn't have dinner, lost-lost track of time," he said, and the frown on her forehead thankfully disappeared. "Please come in," he added, opening the door wider to let her in as he quickly went back to the table to clear out all the schematics gathered there. 

"Let me just clear that out and I'll get some plates."

"Oh no Fitz you don't have to. I'll just give you your share and I'll leave you to it. I don't want to impose on you if you had other plans for the--"

"Don't-don't be ridiculous, you cooked it, least I can do is welcome you in, well, into your own house but still," he cut her off and she let out a small chuckle, which he took as a good sign. "I don't mind the c-company. In fact I think it'd be … nice. Yeah, really nice."

"Oh," she simply said in a tone he wasn't quite sure he knew the meaning of, and it was only then that he realized that maybe she did only mean to bring him food and now he was trapping her in an awkward dinner when SHE might have had other plans. And now that he thought of it, she might have possibly misinterpreted it all as a disguised date (which really wasn't what he had in mind) with an idiot who couldn't get three sentences out without stuttering, and she was trying to find a nice way of saying she wasn't interested and would have rather had dinner alone. 

"But hum only if you want to, you probably have better things to do anyway and--"

"No Fitz you're right actually, that'd be really nice," she cut him off, gently placing one hand on his shoulder and that, more than any word, finally managed to stop him in his tracks and made him realize they were probably on the same page here.

"Good," he replied and her sincere, wide smile gave him the courage to be a little bolder than he would have usually been with an almost complete stranger (even one who somehow already kind of felt like a friend). "And I mean… I don't want to leave you all alone in that house to get even c-c-crazier… who knows what you might end up saying ..." 

"What-what do you- FITZ!"

-0-0-0-

"I'm not saying it's the easiest thing to do but if your ship can travel through space and time, you should be able to manage some sort of cloaking."

"But it can assume another shape and size from the outside, that's pretty cool on its own, don't you think?" 

"Yeah, and it's been stuck that way since forever. Honestly, that's just lazy writing," Fitz declared like it was final. Jemma bumped his shoulder and rolled her eyes good-naturedly before turning back towards the TV. 

As they got ready to eat at the table and Fitz got increasingly nervous about having to trust his brain not to turn to mush and make it all incredibly awkward, Jemma had noticed the TV playing Doctor Who reruns in the background. The sound was muted and he'd completely forgotten about leaving the TV on after lunch. After enthusiastically explaining everything she loved about the specific episode playing and how it had been so long since she'd seen it, it had obviously occurred to Fitz that it was the perfect solution. Eating while watching something they both liked. They'd have something to talk about and give Fitz the time to breathe if he felt his aphasia acting up again at some point. 

They were now on the fourth episode, food was long finished and they were now on their second beer. Fitz hadn't spoken so clearly in months and he felt warm all over, which was only partly due to Jemma's body heat he could feel radiate from her but mostly had to do with this whole evening that made him feel like a normal human being, and more importantly himself, again. 

"But the phone box is so typically British, they can't change now. People would be lost!" she replied and Fitz huffed.

"Hence the cloaking! And I don't buy the whole "it's just stuck" thing, I'm sure he could fix it if he wanted to!"

"Could you?" 

"What?"

"Fix a spaceship," she explained and Fitz turned to her, his eyebrows frowned in confusion. Her smile widened. "Is that what you do when you're not busy fixing mixers?"

Fitz laughed and winced at how unconvincing that sounded. Her eyebrows raised in interest and Fitz had to turn away from her. He hadn't realized how close they'd gotten and looking so deeply into her eyes didn't help his messy brain work properly. He couldn't actually fix spaceships but he could build very advanced planes and the cloaking to go with. Or well, he would soon enough. But even with the state of things in SHIELD, he didn't think he was allowed to tell her what he'd been working on. And he didn't want to lie either, he didn't want to tell her some bullshit about designing any other uninteresting things his brain was too tired to come up with now anyway.

So he did the next best thing he could think of and that still felt like being himself.

"Ah no, I only work on the time travel modules. Those are very tricky, you don't want to go around touching everything and-and… messing it all up…"

"Of course," she nodded with an amused smile. "But really, I was wondering if—"

Her words were cut off by the biggest, most embarrassing yawn Fitz had ever let out in his life. 

"Well, I think that's my cue to leave," she said, sounding a little disappointed. "I tend to get carried away when I speak about—"

"Oh no, no, no, I'm sorry, it's just… I went hu-hu running this afternoon and I-I hu… getting tired, that's all."

"Oh, that's nice," she said, turning around to face him and, if it was possible, get even closer to him. "Can you believe that I've been living in this beautiful place for months and I'm still running on a treadmill?" she asked, lowering her voice like she was admitting a terrible secret and Fitz couldn't help grinning before he dramatically put his hand over his heart and took on a shocked expression.

"Well, you should come with me!"

"Ah no, I don't want to impose on—"

"You're not imposing, I'm offering. We can start tomorrow," he insisted. Who was this confident young man taking initiative and inviting a woman to watch him exercise of all things? 

And, even more incredible, she didn't seem put out by it. She actually gave him a big smile.

"But I have to be back to the cafe around 7am to start baking so we'd need to go running at six or even sooner…" she said and burst out laughing at what was probably the horrified expression on his face. 

"Ah, don't worry about it Fitz, I'm sure I'll be able to motivate myself eventually—"

"What about Monday? Monday's your day off right?" 

"Ah yes, you're right," she replied with what he hoped was a pleased little smile. "We wouldn't have to start so early on Monday."

"Then, it's a date!" he declared enthusiastically before his eyes widened as he realized that it wasn't maybe the best choice of words if he didn't want her to feel like there was some hidden motive behind his proposition to go running together. Like there was something even the tiniest bit romantic about being in sweatpants and—

"Thank you, Fitz," she said, gently squeezing his arm and thankfully putting a stop to his racing thoughts. "Sounds like a fantastic way to start my day off."

"Yeah?" he asked.

She rubbed her thumb over the skin of his wrist and squeezed his arm once more before letting go and looking up at him with a soft smile.

"Yeah."

"Well done mate, really smooth!" Fitz heard in the back of his mind as he noticed Jemma settling back on the couch for a moment longer. Fitz wanted to roll his eyes but Hunter’s was actually a nice voice to hear, and to be fair to himself, considering his usual awkwardness with new people, he'd been rather smooth in convincing Jemma to spend more time with him. Although the best part probably was that she actually didn't seem to need much convincing.

-0-0-0-

Fitz shuffled through the hallway and towards the living room, coffee in one hand, trainers in the other. How could someone's _knock_ be so cheerful and energetic when he'd been up for twenty minutes and still didn't really feel _awake_? It's been too long since anyone had seen him that soon after waking up and he didn't know if he was ready after all. But then, he saw her silhouette through the door and she looked like she was actually jumping on the spot as she waited for him to open the door and Fitz couldn't help smiling. 

He dropped his trainers by the couch and took one last gulp of coffee before putting his mug on the table. He tried putting his curls in order but it was a lost cause and it would have to wait until after he'd taken a shower. 

"Hello, Fitz!" Jemma quipped the moment she came into view and Fitz wondered for a moment if he wasn't still asleep after all and having a very nice although slightly embarrassing dream. He'd been expecting her to wear a slightly nicer, more feminine version of his own sweatpants and old t-shirt but he couldn't have been further from the truth. She was wearing a skintight tank top and her hair was up in a ponytail showing the lovely skin of her neck and her face looked all fresh and… dewy. He wasn't exactly sure what dewy meant when applied to someone's skin but he had a feeling that was it. And her running leggings, though they covered her legs till just under the knees, left very little to the imagination when it came to the lovely curves of the lower part of her body. And well, he wasn't sure if his brain was awake but his body definitely was and it was probably a good thing he was wearing his comfy sweatpants. 

"Fitz? Did I wake you up? I'm sorry, I'm always up very early and maybe we should have agreed on a specific time instead of just bright and early and—"

"No, no, that's alright, I-I" he cut her off then shook his head and cleared his throat to try and focus on talking to her and stop looking at her like an idiot. "I'm just-I'm just not a morning person, that's all," he added and she flashed him a bright smile. 

"Come in, I just need five minutes to brush my teeth and hu-hu," he stuttered as he nodded towards his naked feet. 

"Put on your trainers?" she finished for him and he smiled gratefully.

After brushing his teeth and splashing his face with large amounts of cold water, Fitz came back to the living room to find Jemma bent over doing stretches or whatever, and considered going back to the bathroom to splash cold water all over himself. But she was up and bouncing on her feet again before he could do or say anything so he zeroed in towards the couch to start putting on his shoes. 

"So, do you want to warm up a bit before we start running?" 

"Oh, hum, sure, I—" he started before remembering her notion of warming up probably involved more stretching and not more coffee. "Actually, I'm good. I just-I just like walking until I'm on the road and then start hum…"

"Running?" 

"Yeah," Fitz replied, chuckling self-deprecatingly. "Unless you want to—"

"No, that sounds good to me!" she quipped then took his hand and pulled him up and towards the door. 

She only let go of his hand when they were outside and switched to looping her arm through his as she started walking up to the road enthusiastically. Fitz wasn't sure he'd be up to her level of energy but her enthusiasm was certainly contagious. A mischievous smile started blooming on his face and he picked up the pace a bit. She looked sideways at him and he raised his eyebrows at her. She grinned and picked up the pace a little bit more. And then it was his turn again, and by the time they made it to the road, they were both running and laughing breathlessly. 

-0-0-0-

"Fitz, that was such a breathtaking view! I can't believe I've been living here for months and haven't taken the time to go there yet! We have to go back earlier next time. To see the sunrise!"

"Sure," Fitz let out as he took another deep breath. He was really glad that she'd ended up having a good time and was enjoying Scotland as much as it should always be enjoyed. And Fitz knew the view was spectacular, he'd just been too busy trying not to pass out to actually look at the sun slowly moving up in the sky to bathe the whole landscape in soft golden light, her words not his. This was Perthshire after all and there was no way you could walk a few miles on a road without stumbling upon a hill. Fitz just didn't think Jemma would want to run up this one. They'd run almost four miles already, it seemed like a reasonable moment to rest a bit and walk instead of running. But there was apparently still quite a lot of fight and pride in him, and when she showed no sign of wanting to stop, Fitz had just followed, ignoring his legs and lungs begging for him to stop.

"Everything alright?" she asked, probably realizing that his answer was maybe just a little less than enthusiastic. They'd switched to walking five minutes ago so Jemma must have decided it was okay to stop altogether because she'd turned around to face him, a slightly worried expression on her face. 

"Yeah, yeah, just hu… catching my breath," he replied, giving her what he hoped was an encouraging smile. She nodded and smiled back at him a little shyly. She crossed her arms over her chest.

"You know, I was just saying that, we don't have to do anything. You've been nice enough to invite me to go running with you and—"

"No!" he cut her off. "I mean… I don't feel o-o-obligated. Sounds… nice, I'm just…"

"Tired."

"Yeah," he confirmed, giving her a grateful smile and she seemed to relax.

Waking up even earlier didn't sound very appealing to him but Jemma's enthusiasm was very contagious and he would have done pretty much anything if it meant she'd spend all the time smiling at him and holding on to his arm. Of course, it wasn't lost on him either that watching the sunrise together sounded like something very romantic. Which filled him in equal parts with nervousness, dread and excitement. He knew he shouldn't read too much into it, Jemma was obviously just friendly and didn't have many options in terms of people she could spend time with, what with her living in the middle of nowhere. But it still felt nice to feel wanted, in one way or another, and to be given one more reason to make his brain heal faster. 

"Then come have brunch, it'll give you some strength back," she said, squeezing his arm softly before she started walking towards the cafe.

"Oh no, you don't have to-to… cook for me, it's your day off."

"I know I don't have to but I really don't mind",

"No really, I'll just have some hu… cereal or something, you should rest—" 

"Fitz," she cut him off, and he almost crashed into her as she stopped walking once more. "You know I really do enjoy spending time with you, right?" 

"You do?" he asked, his voice tentative as he felt his cheeks grow a little hotter. 

"Yes!" she let out, rolling her eyes good-naturedly. 

"Okay then. Me too," he replied a little shyly.

She smiled fondly before raising an eyebrow.

"Now, do you _want_ to come have brunch with me?" 

"I'd like that yes." 

"Lovely," she replied, her smile turning wider before looping her arm in his once more. "So what d'you feel like eating?" 

"Everything you cook's amazing. And I'm-m famished, I'd eat anything." 

"Don't you always?" she asked, bumping his shoulder and he just shrugged. She wasn't wrong. "Well, I'll see what I have— Oh I forgot to grab the mail," she cut herself off as she stopped walking. "Do you mind getting it while I—"

"--start working on brunch?" 

She nodded and Fitz grinned widely, feeling exaggeratedly proud for finishing her sentence. It really was quite obvious what she meant to say but he hadn't finished someone else's sentence since before the accident and to him, that felt big. 

"I'll get the mail," he said and she squeezed his arm once more before walking towards the cafe. Fitz turned back towards the crossing where the mailbox was without even watching Jemma walk away in her tight leggings. Okay, maybe, he _saw_ her walk away. But only for a second. Or ten. 

-0-0-0-

"I didn't know you were interested in science," Fitz said as he put Jemma's mail on the counter. It was mostly crap mail and a few bills, apparently, but there was also the latest issue of Science Today. 

Jemma turned around and came to take a look at the rest of the mail before giving a much more interested look at the magazine.

"I wasn't always a proud cafe owner and baker, you know…"

She looked at him with raised eyebrows for a second. Wait, was that something he was supposed to know? God, he hoped it wasn't something she said while he was too busy staring at her to listen properly.

"Biochemist," she said by way of an explanation.

"Oh right. I always thought there was something uh-uh... scientific in the way you bake."

"Right," she said, trailing off before shaking her head, smiling and turning around to start cutting the fruit she had on her board.

"I needed a change of scenery," she added, the tone of her voice more distant it seemed, although it might have just been the fact that she was facing away from him. "And I remembered liking Perthshire so much when I went there. It was our last family holiday together before dad got sick... And then I found this ad and fell in love with the cottage and, that was it." 

"Oh, I didn't know about your father, did he get—"

"He died," she said, turning back towards him with a sad smile. "A year later. But that's alright, it's been ten years now and I'm still grateful for the time I got to spend with him."

"I'm still very sorry for you, I-I know what it's like, growing up without a fa-fa-father."

She took a step closer and leaned against the counter.

"Oh. Did he—"

"He left. When I was ten."

"I'm so sorry, Fitz."

"I'm not. I mean I was back then but I-I… Now I know we were better off without him."

Fitz regretted his words for a second because here he was declaring he was glad his dad left when she'd lost hers when she was still so young. But her eyes were soft and understanding. They had both been through a terrible loss of a different sort at a young age and hers didn't diminish the gravity of his. She extended her arm and put her hand over his on the counter, squeezing lightly. He looked down before smiling up at her and put his other hand over hers in some sort of hand sandwich. Jemma let out a small laugh at his gesture but her expression was incredibly tender when she tilted her head to the side as she looked at him. 

Fitz felt like there was much more to her story but he didn't want to push. There was so much _he_ couldn't tell her about his story that he'd feel grateful for anything she would be willing to share about hers.

"So hum... can I help you with anything?"

"Uh sure," she answered, clearing her throat before nodding towards the shelves behind her. "Can you make some tea?"

Fitz nodded and walked around the counter. After a week of feeling too awkward sitting alone in the restaurant while Jemma cooked only for him, he had lost all shyness about walking behind the counter and actually made himself at home like Jemma asked him to. 

He filled the electric kettle and turned it on then prepared the tea-pot with the jasmine tea he knew Jemma liked best. While he waited for the water to boil, he couldn't help chuckling as he picked what he thought were the least ugly teacups from Jemma's cupboard.

"You know," she said, looking up at him with a grin. "I think I'm going to keep all of Mrs McIntosh's tea cups after all. They're so ugly and over the top that it kind of makes them, you know..."

"Hipster?" 

"Exactly!"

Fitz couldn't help smiling internally at the fact that he not only finished her sentence, but with a word he'd never even used before. His speech abilities were definitely getting better. Along with his fine motor skills. Actually, everything was getting better since he'd decided to rent Jemma's house. His mood hadn't been so good in ages and he was finally feeling like himself again despite the fact that he had to hide a huge portion of his life to the one and only person he talked to on a daily basis. 

"Or something out of Umbridge's office," Fitz couldn't help adding as he looked down to the aggressively pink tea cup.

Jemma grinned happily as she finally put down her knife and came to stand next to him. How much fruit did she think he could eat once he'd gulped down the pile of pancakes on the counter and the other things he could hear and smell cooking in the kitchen?

"Well that too, I suppose. Anyway, I like them. They have... character."

"Yes. I guess you can call it that…" 

She bumped his shoulder as she looked up at him with a tenderness that didn't fit the reaction he expected out of his teasing. As his heart started to grow even warmer, he found that he couldn't look away, until the kettle started whistling and they both startled. Jemma chuckled, gave him one last shy smile and walked away to take care of whatever was cooking in the kitchen. Fitz poured the water in the kettle and put it, along with the sugar, milk, teacups and plate of fruit on a platter and brought it to the table. Jemma soon came back with two big plates, what looked liked freshly squeezed orange juice and a big, proud smile on her face. 

Jemma and brunch, he could definitely get used to this new way of starting the day.


	4. Chapter 4

Today was a bad day. Fitz was trying his best to remind himself that recovery from brain damage wasn't linear. That was the one thing every doctor and nurse had repeated tirelessly for the months that he'd been in therapy but that didn't stop his temper from flaring up when he couldn't manage to put back together the ancient and very basic hand mixer he was supposed to fix for Jemma. 

Yesterday had been perfect, starting with a little running session with Jemma where he didn't even feel like his lungs were on fire this time, brunch, and then he'd been feeling so clear headed and relaxed that he'd finally finished his night night gun design. That was a really advanced non lethal gun design, for which he'd managed to solve every little problem he'd encountered in the past months, and today, he couldn't fix something he would have with his eyes closed when he was five. In fact, he was almost sure Jemma could fix it herself and just used it as an excuse to come see him, which he didn't mind at all, and probably also to ask more questions about his job. Which made him feel a little nervous and more than a little guilty and frustrated for not being allowed to share more of his life with her. 

But anyway, he'd accepted the job, planning on making it a little better too by reducing the shaking that created disagreeable vibrations in her hand and arm when she used it. And now he was completely stuck, his brain having apparently turned back to mush and his hand shaking more than it had in weeks. 

He knew it mostly had to do with the terrible night he'd had. Despite his good mood of the previous day, the nightmares had made a comeback. He was stuck at the bottom of the lake once more, unable to swim back up, as if he was pulled back by some invisible hand. His father's voice was there too, telling him he was weak and that it was probably better if he stayed there. Fitz had woken up panting and after falling back asleep and into that same dream again and again, he'd gotten out of bed before sunrise, exhausted and with a terrible headache. He'd been trying all morning to think of his friends telling him not to be too hard on himself and that it was okay to just rest but the voice of his father was always the loudest on such days.

It was the middle of the afternoon when Fitz was startled out of his dark thoughts by a knock on the door. He didn't even have to look up to know who it was because who else would it be anyway? Fitz sighed. No good usually came out of him being around people when he was in such a mood. But Jemma could see him through the window and she'd worry and insist if he didn't answer anyway.

"Come in!"

She seemed to hesitate for a moment before opening the unlocked door, and Fitz could almost hear the collective gasp of his colleagues for not having _secured his position_. She came to stand next to the table facing him and Fitz had no choice but to look up. 

"Hey," he said with little enthusiasm.

"Hey. You didn't come for breakfast so I wanted to make sure everything was okay," she replied, smiling tentatively.

"I wasn't hungry."

"But I thought you were always a little hungry," she teased.

"Well, not today."

"Oh. Okay…" 

She was starting to pick up on his mood and he wished she would just leave him alone before things got worse.

"Um, I was just wondering if maybe you had the time to fix the mixer. It's alright if you haven't, I—"

"No," he cut her off. "I c-c-c," he stuttered before giving up and turning around to show her the device pulled apart on the coffee table.

"Oh. Fitz, is everything alright?" She tried to reach for his hand but he pulled it away before she could. He didn't want her to realize how bad it was shaking. 

"Fine. I just-I just… need… alone," he said before standing up and turning away from her. She followed him.

"Fitz, are you sure there's nothing—"

"I'll take care of the-of the… mixer later. Now, please… leave me alone." 

"Fitz! I don’t care about the bloody mixer, just tell me what's wrong."

Her voice was harsher than he'd ever heard it. Even with that rude customer the other day, he was amazed by how calm and composed she'd remained when he just wanted to tell him to fuck off. 

"Nothing!" he cried out despite himself as he turned back to look at her. "Just please leave," he said and reached for her arm to try and push her towards the door but she was the one to pull away, looking mightily hurt as well as a little mad. 

"I know I'm not memorable enough for you to..." she trailed off for a second before speaking again. "But at least I thought we were friends now. Why won't you tell me anything?"

Fitz stopped in his tracks at her words. God, had he regressed so much that not only he couldn't speak properly but didn't understand what other people said either?

"What? What do you— Oh fuck!" He made a too wide gesture with his hand and his coffee mug hit the floor with a loud bang and burst into pieces. Almost as a reflex, he bent over to pick it up, taking the sharp pieces with his still shaking hands while she went to retrieve some paper towels to wipe the coffee and smaller pieces off the floor. 

"Fitz," she said once more, her voice softer now. "What's making you stutter and your hands shake? I thought you'd tell me on your own but you don't look fine and maybe I can help, you know I'm—"

"No, no, no, no," he cut her off. He'd been getting so much better, she couldn't see him like that, not when he looked like such a freak. "You have to-to-to—"

"Oh my god, Fitz, your hand!"

Well yeah, his hand was shaking. Big news. Why did she have to— Oh. That was a lot of blood. He'd been so overwhelmed that he hadn't even noticed the porcelain cutting his skin. He'd never liked the sight of blood very much and his ears were starting to buzz. There was a really good chance he might pass out and she couldn't see him like that. She had to leave. 

"Please, Jemma. Leave." 

"What? No, I have to take care of your hand."

She tried to reach for his hand once more but he used his hold to push her towards the door.

"S-s-sorry. I'll p-p-pay for the mug."

His blood was boiling and he wouldn't hold it together much longer.

"Fitz no! I don't care about that mug, just—"

"No! Leave me alone!" he shouted. 

She stepped back almost automatically and she looked so pained that Fitz regretted his outburst almost immediately. He knew it. He shouldn't be around people when he was like that. Or most likely, he shouldn't be around people at all.

"S-s-sorry," he said, pushing her the rest of the way through the door. "T'was a mistake. I'll pay and leave tonight."

And with that he closed the door and locked it.

"Fitz no! Please, just let me in!" she cried out through the door. "I'm sorry I shouldn't have insisted but let me take care of your hand. I'm really worried." 

Pacing almost frantically, he tried to ignore her voice but it was no use. He couldn't even ignore the voices in his head. 

"Fitz, I'm not leaving until you've let me take care of your hand." 

Her tone was less pleading and more commanding and Fitz had a feeling that she was indeed stubborn enough to stay behind the door all day. His own fire had left him though. He wasn't angry or panicked or whatever he'd been earlier, he was just sad and exhausted because he'd just messed up one more relationship in his life. 

He took a few steps towards the door and just slid against it until he was sitting on the floor, trying but failing to ignore the blood dripping from his hand. 

"Wouldn't be such a big loss if I bled out."

"Don't say that! Fitz, please let me in..."

"I'm alright."

"No, you're not. I don't know much about you yet but I know you might pass out from the sight of blood alone."

God, he wanted her to leave as much as he wanted to let her in and the result was that his already mushy brain just wouldn't let him do a thing, and he remained there on the ground, waiting for his body to make a decision.

"Fitz?"

She must have sat on the ground as well because her voice sounded like it resonated through his skull. 

"Fine. If you won't talk to me, I will. After all, you have no reason to trust me with your story if I don't with mine."

So, there was indeed more to be said.

"Where do I start? Ah yes, so hum… I wasn't even seventeen when I got my PhDs so finding a job was never an issue. Rather, it was finding the right one. Anyway, I got recruited right out of University by the American government. It was really exciting and I went to their Academy and had an amazing first day. So that night, I called my mom to tell her everything and she told me about my dad."

Well, that sounded familiar. His memory wasn't as sharp as it used to be but he definitely remembered being recruited right out of Uni and being so excited and scared on his first day at the… Wait—

"I already told you what happened next," she added, her voice carrying all the sadness obviously more vivid that she liked to believe. "My mom tried to hide the gravity of it but I knew what those words meant. I took a plane home the next day and found a job closer to home. It wasn't the best but it was close enough that I could visit my dad everyday in the end. But they must have seen my potential because I was given promotion after promotion and all the best projects until I was asked to work on a drug that would create instant paralysis and unconsciousness with minimum side effects to be used as a non-lethal weapon. I was excited because I thought those could replace actual guns in so many situations. But there was an accident in the lab. It created a gas that almost killed one of my coworkers. We were all really shook and we took all the precautions for it not to ever happen again but my boss didn't see it that way…"

"Oh no," Fitz let out, probably not even loud enough for her to hear. He knew where this was going. He'd heard that kind of story before.

"While I kept working on my project, he gave the result of my accident to another team in secret. I still learned about it at some point but it was too late, it was in the last testing phase and due to certain parts of my contract, I had claim on my current project's rights but not on what my team created by accident."

"So that's when you left?"

He felt the door move between them, like she'd been startled to hear his voice. 

"Yes. I didn't know what to do but I knew I had to leave. I considered working for Doctors Without Borders for a while but I wanted to stay close to home and that's when I found the ad. I drove to Perthshire the next day, spent two hours talking with Mrs McIntosh and the next day, I was going to the bank to get a loan to buy the place. I wanted to do something simple but that could give people a little happiness. Which I failed as well since it's the middle of the afternoon on a Thursday and I don't have a single client."

That tone of self deprecation, more than anything else, was what finally got him to move, stand up and put his hand on the door knob. He was very used to that tone when talking about himself and he knew how destructive it could be. He didn't know Jemma well but he had the deep conviction that she was a good person who didn't deserve this. He unlocked the door and waited a few more seconds until he heard Jemma stand up as well before he slowly opened it. 

There was so much he wanted to say to her after the story she'd told him but then he saw her face, a mix of nervousness, worry and hopelessness and it all came back in a flash. 

"Do you remember having a conversation about d-d-dielectric polarization with a scrawny kid with too much hair?"

Her expression turned in the brightest smile he'd ever seen as she nodded. How could he ever forget such a smile? A smile that meant she was just as happy as he was to have found someone equally excited about something as unlikely as dielectric polarization and a smile he hoped meant she knew it was still just as important for him.

"So that was you, right? First day of SHIELD Academy?"

She nodded once more.

"God, I'm so sorry!" he said, taking his head in his hands, feeling his cheeks heat up in shame. 

She pulled his -ugh- bloodied hand away and forced him to look at her. She was still smiling so she probably wasn't too angry but she still deserved a bit of an explanation.

"I was in a coma. Brain damage," he said, pointing to the side of his head. "No memory loss per say but it becomes kind of…"

"Hazy?"

"Yeah. On older memories. But I remember you now. The best conversation I had ever had in my entire life." 

"Oh, no, that can't be—"

"Still is. And your cakes are delicious!"

She raised her eyebrows in amusement and slight confusion. His brain also had the tendency to jump back and forth between topics these days and it was a lot of information to process. 

"They make _me_ happy. It's not o-o-obvious now but I'm getting… better. Thanks to you," he said, shyly looking up at her. 

"Oh, Fitz…" 

He didn't have the time to decide what her tone meant because the next second, she was pulling him into a hug. Tentative at first, she held onto him tighter when she felt him reciprocate and it was like all the tensions of the day and all the nightmares were leaving his body for a moment. 

"And I'm happy you're here too," she whispered against the skin of his neck. "And not only because you fix things." 

Fitz chuckled as his chest filled with a warmth that definitely had nothing to do with her icy fingers he could feel on his back through his shirt. They remained like that for a moment and Fitz would have been fine being like that for the rest of the day if Jemma hadn't broken the silence again.

"Fitz?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I take care of your hand now before you bleed out on my sweater?" 

"Oh no!" Fitz cried out as he pulled back and saw the big red spot he'd left on her blue sweater. 

"That's alright, it'll wash off. Now come with me."

She took his hand, not really leaving him a choice as she pulled him in her wake into the house and towards the bathroom. She pulled out an emergency kit he hadn't even noticed yet from the cupboard under the sink and gently pushed him to sit on the side of the tub. Fitz couldn't help smiling at how natural it felt for her to boss him around and how he actually didn't mind at all. Especially when she was being so delicate and careful as she cleaned his wound and tended to it. As much as he liked to believe he was a grumpy old man who didn't need anyone, it was overwhelming in the best possible way to know he had someone looking out for him at all times.

"Alright," she said as she looked for the proper bandage to wrap his palm in. The cut apparently wasn't deep enough to warrant stitches but it was quite large and it would take a few days before there was no risk of reopening. "Now that I told you mine, would you like to tell me the story of your injury?" 

"I-I… not today. I'm just-I'm exhausted, I don't—"

"Okay," she cut him off, her smile soft and understanding. "Whenever you're ready." 

"I'm so sorry for what happened to you. It's-it's... unfair. But thank you for telling me and for e-e-everything."

And he really was infinitely grateful, not only because she understood how hard it could be for him to talk about it but because a part of her probably knew that however much he wanted to tell her, he still didn't know how much he was even allowed to tell her. He could almost see the million questions she must have in her eyes, about Hydra and the state of SHIELD but she didn't push. She just gave his hand a small squeeze and changed the subject.

"But don't you ever again threaten to leave over breaking an ugly mug." 

Her expression was teasing and he probably deserved it for being so dramatic but there was also a lingering anger in her eyes that made his heart flutter. Not that he never had anyone care for him enough to make this kind of declaration but no one quite like Jemma Simmons. 

"Promise." 

She gave him another look that seemed to mean "you better" before her expression changed once more.

"You know, I didn't think you had too much hair. The day we first met." 

Fitz chuckled as he looked down at her hands wrapping the bandage around his, feeling his cheeks heat up at the compliment.

"Can't believe you remembered me."

"Fitz! Of course, I remembered you," she said, shaking her head as if it was so obvious. "When I came to the Academy, I was excited but I was aIso nervous. I was afraid I'd feel as alone as I was in University with everyone being so much older. And you came along, so young and Scottish and so incredibly smart."

She smiled up at him and Fitz wanted to slap himself once more for daring to forget someone like her.

"I thought about finding you before leaving, to stay in touch, but I felt like it'd be too hard knowing you'd be living my dream while I had to give it up... I still wish I had though."

"Me too."

A lot of things from that time were still blurry but he did remember the disappointment when Jemma never came back, and how terribly lonely he'd felt for a long time. He'd made friends at the Academy after a time but no one like her, no one with whom he'd felt such an instant connection. How amazing his time at the Academy would have been if she was there? 

Well, it was too late to go through the Academy once more but they were both in the same place at the same time now so maybe this was their second chance.


	5. Chapter 5

"Come on, Jemma, it's not so cold!"

"Yes, it is. It's freezing!" she called out from where she was standing in her bikini top and shorts on the shore of the lake, her toes barely touching the water.

"Here we call that invigorating." She raised her eyebrows at him and stayed exactly where she was. Fitz chuckled. "If you want to become a true Scot, you have to take a swim in the lake."

"I don't need to become a Scot, I'm perfectly fine with being an English girl living in Perthshire." 

"But you came all this way, you're not going to give up now and leave me all alone in the water," Fitz said with an exaggerated pout and, sighing, Jemma took a few more steps in his direction, the water now reaching her ankles.

Fitz had been afraid that things might get awkward after their kind of argument because, in retrospect, he felt a little ridiculous for reacting so dramatically but things were actually really nice between them now. Different but in a nice kind of way. It was like knowing Jemma's story and remembering her from their first day at the Academy had brought them closer. She was also more openly affectionate with him and that was definitely not something Fitz was going to complain about. Like when he found an ugly set of teacups with kittens on them while grocery shopping in the village and decided to offer them to her as a joke to replace the mug he had broken. She had squealed with joy like it was an actual kitten, and pulled him into a hug. 

And this newfound closeness was why he had asked her to go to the lake with him on her day off. Officially, it was because the days were getting much hotter and she'd mentioned wanting to discover all that Perthshire had to offer, which was true as well, but there was also another reason. Well, actually a few, but mostly one important one. Which he'd hopefully come to at some point today but not before he made a true Scot out of her, whether she wanted it or not. 

"Oh, fine," she finally let out before walking back a few steps, taking her shorts off and walking back in a little more decisively. Apparently, a little guilt and defiance worked wonders to get something out of her. She stopped when she was in front of him and had water up to her stomach. 

"See, this isn't so bad."

"Fitz, it's bloody freezing," she said once more, her voice all shaky as her body trembled. 

The water did take a little getting used to, he supposed. He reached out to pull her into a hug, as had become almost a reflex now, before he realized they were both basically in their underwear. It was one thing to wrap her in his arms when they were watching TV together and they both wore at least one layer of clothes, it was another when she wore little enough for him to notice the goosebumps all over her skin and, oh no, her hardened nipples. 

So he just gently rubbed her arm instead but Jemma didn't seem to have a problem with them wearing so little because she threw her arms around his neck and pulled him close until their bodies were pressed together. 

Fortunately, or not, Fitz didn't have the time to consider how nice it felt because she squealed and pulled back immediately. 

"You're freezing!" she cried out, looking properly betrayed, and he burst out laughing.

"Well yeah, I was just in the water, what did you expect?" She pouted. "Are you sure you're a genius?"

She glared at him and put her hands into the water to splash him and he grinned.

"But you're usually so hot," she protested and her eyes went wide almost immediately when he grinned even wider in reaction. "I didn't mean-I mean that your body is- No, wait, that doesn't—"

"That's alright, I've been told my body's hot pretty often," he cut her off. He hadn't really, unless he had a fever and the person meant exactly what Jemma was trying to say, but she was blushing a lot at the moment and it was adorable. It had been a really long time since he'd felt comfortable enough with someone new to tease them and, at least that's how it felt on his part, flirt. 

Understanding that it was a lost cause, Jemma chose another tactic and splashed even more water on him. 

"Jemma, if you keep doing that, it's not going to end well for you," he said, raising a defiant eyebrow.

She grinned and did it again.

"Oh yeah?"

Fitz put his hand up just over the surface and quickly pushed the water towards her, resulting in a literal wave of cold water hitting her upper body.

"Fitz!" she squealed as she gasped at the coldness of it.

"Told you. At least now, you're completely wet and you can come have a proper swim with me," he said before sinking completely under the water and coming back up to start swimming. 

"You're the worst!" she declared petulantly but still did the same and followed as he started swimming towards the center of the lake. 

The place was incredibly peaceful and quiet. Despite it being the middle of July and the height of the tourist season, there was no one else bathing at the lake and the only noises were the light wind in the trees, the singing of birds and the sound of them swimming. And that's when it hit him. Fitz had been both anticipating and dreading coming here to swim. He'd always felt comfortable in the water and he was afraid it'd been ruined for him by what had happened, but earlier he put his head underwater like it was nothing and carried on. Feeling bold, Fitz took another dive, swam underwater for a few meters then came back up and turned towards Jemma. Her nose was slightly scrunched up. 

"Everything alright?" she asked.

"Yeah. It's just… nice here. With you." 

Her eyes turned all soft as she smiled at him and Fitz did feel his body get all warm inside. 

"Yes. Really nice."

They stayed in the lake a little longer, swimming and enjoying the beauty and peacefulness of the surroundings until even _he_ started to get too cold and they slowly made it back to shore. Fitz hurried to get out first, running the few meters left to reach the place where they'd left their stuff and bent over to grab Jemma's towel and bring it to her. When he turned around though, she was already out of the water and walking towards him. She quickly looked up when he did and it looked like she was trying to hide a smile behind her hand. What could possibly make her smile that she didn't want him to know about? Wait… Had she been looking at his butt?

But before Fitz could spend too long thinking about Jemma possibly thinking about his butt, she was right in front of him and shivering all over and his instinct took over. He unfolded the towel and wrapped it around her shoulders, hesitating only a second before pulling her into his embrace and rubbing her arms and back to get some warmth into her. 

"Better?" he asked a moment later as he pulled back from the hug. 

"Much," she replied, her voice still a little shaky. And then she pushed up on her tiptoes, one hand still on his shoulder and Fitz thought his heart might burst out of his chest as her face got closer. He made an embarrassing noise in the back of his throat that he hoped wasn't as loud as he thought it was when she pressed her lips to his cheek and lingered just long enough to say "thank you" before moving back. 

His eyes followed her face as it came back into focus and he had to fight really hard not to put his hand on his cheek where it felt like it was still burning from her kiss despite her lips being really cold. 

"Hungry?" she asked after a few seconds.

"Hu?" 

"Picnic?" she said, nodding towards the basket on the ground. 

"Oh. Hu… sure?" 

Honestly, he wasn't sure of anything at the moment but it was past noon and he'd been swimming for some time in cold water, so eating seemed like a good option.

-0-0-0-

Since it was Fitz's idea to come here in the first place, he had offered to take care of the picnic as well but Jemma had insisted on doing it, arguing that she'd be a terrible coffee shop owner if she didn't provide food and beverages on this sort of outing. Not feeling too sad about the prospect considering how delicious everything had been, Fitz had still decided to take it upon himself to take care of everything else. He had bought a nice picnic basket, proper beach towels and even nice little beach pillows if they wanted to soak in some Perthshire sun while they were there. 

The latter, he apparently bought for nothing though because Jemma had just decided to rest her head on his stomach as she lay perpendicular to him. 

"Not that I mind you using me as one, but you know we have actual pillows, right?" he said, his voice a little sleepy. He felt the kind of delightful drowsiness only a swim in cold water followed by a nice meal and lie down in the sun could give you.

"I know but your belly's more comfy," she said, sounding indeed very content.

"I don't know how I should take that but I've been doing a lot of situps, you know?"

She laughed as she turned her head to look at him. 

"I know, I've noticed. Firm is comfy," she said with a smile that made his heart do a little flip in his chest. "And you're much warmer as well."

She was always seeking warmth and cuddles. She was like the sweetest, smartest little house cat he ever met. Which he really didn't mind at all. 

"And you're also a much better swimmer than you said you were," she added after a moment.

"Ah, yes, I suppose... which reminds me that there was another reason I asked you to come here with me. Well, a few actually but mostly one."

"Oh?"

"There's something I've been meaning to tell you but I didn't know how." 

Which was only partially true actually. After what, in retrospect, would have been the best moment to tell her his story (when she'd just told him hers), Fitz had been wondering how to broach the subject for the past two weeks. But there was also the matter of actually being allowed to tell her and if he could trust her. He hated that he had to think like that but he knew better now than to trust too easily. But Bobbi had done her research and given him the go ahead, adding that he "go get it tiger", whatever that meant. 

"I'm listening Fitz, whatever you want to tell me," she said, reaching for his hand and squeezing gently.

"So hum, as you might have guessed, I'm working for SHIELD."

"No way!" she cried out exaggeratedly loud and he chuckled. "Sorry, continue." 

"So I was working in a mobile team. We had a senior agent, two specialists, a very nice plane and my own state of the art mobile lab. Everything was pretty great, except that I had to share it with a biochemist that really, really makes me wish you'd stayed." She just smiled at his declaration and Fitz continued. "Anyway, about seven or eight months ago, Ward, one of the specialists, started acting strangely. Always hanging around in the lab, asking about what I was working on. But I thought he was trying to be friendly and I was flattered."

Fitz had to take a breath then, his throat clenching like it did every time there was the slightest mention of that name. 

"Not long after that, we were on a mission just the two of us. I-I-I wish I could tell you the full story but I-I—"

"That's alright, Fitz," she said, reaching for his hand once more. "Whatever you can tell and in your own time…" 

Jemma was very smart so if she'd been following the news at least a little bit, she probably already knew where part of this was going. And he didn't think he'd find the courage to talk about it again if he didn't tell her everything today. So he took a deep breath, squeezed her hand and carried on.

"Long story short, Ward found himself knocked unconscious and we were in a pretty bad situation when he received a coded message on his phone. I thought it was Coulson, our senior agent and chief of our little mobile unit, so I used his index finger to unlock the phone and decrypt the message. Except it wasn't an escape route, it was coordinates to deliver the schematics to. Which didn't make any sense because our mission had nothing to do with any schematics. So I looked into his backpack and found a memory card that was loaded with several of my schematics, mostly weapons."

"Oh my god… So he was—"

"Hydra? Yes. But all I knew then was that he had betrayed us somehow. So I alerted May, the other specialist, found a car, put him in the back seat and started making my way back to the plane. It was a stupid mistake to assume he'd stay unconscious until I was back. May would have probably tied his arms or something but I was kind of panicking and I-I just-I—" 

She intertwined her fingers with his and only then did he realize how badly his hand was shaking again. He took a deep breath and looked up at her. Her head was turned to the side and she was looking at him. She was smiling softly and he didn't detect any pity in her eyes, just tenderness and empathy. She knew what betrayal felt like and her reaction gave him the strength to continue.

"He jumped me when we were crossing a bridge. I couldn't control the car and drove straight into the lake. Ward got out of the car easily. I didn't." 

"Oh Fitz…"

"I woke up nine days later with a broken arm, a shaky hand and a broken brain."

"Fitz, you're not broken, you're—"

"I know but that's just how it felt when I woke up and couldn't say a word. Doctors said it was aphasia caused by hypoxia, that's—"

"When the brain's deprived of oxygen for too long."

"Yeah… But at least, it wasn't all for nothing I suppose. SHIELD was able to dismantle Hydra before they could carry out the big attack they had planned. It's a big mess but we're still standing and Coulson's now director of a whole new base."

"So you're still working for SHIELD?" she asked and Fitz chuckled. He supposed it was a relevant question since he'd been here for over a month now.

"Yeah. Rehab at the base was driving me crazy so I guess this is some sort of medical leave or whatever you want to call it…" 

"Wow Fitz, that's-that's…" she trailed off, her voice a little shaky as she sat up. He immediately missed the reassuring contact of her hand in his and head on his belly but then she laid back down, this time right next to him, and put her head on his shoulder. "Thank you for telling me. You're such a good person and I'm so sorry something like this happened to you."

She reached for his bad hand again and brought it with her own to rest over his heart. They stayed like that for a long moment without talking as Jemma's closeness and affection slowly brought him back to that nice peaceful state he was in earlier and that's when he realized it. For months, he'd been telling himself that his sacrifice was worth it for saving so many lives and the logical part of his brain truly believed it, but for the first time today, he truly felt it, in his heart.

"I'm not," he simply said and she looked up at him, frowning and ready to argue.

"What? Fitz, you are a good person, I—"

"I mean, I'm not sorry. For what happened. Because it brought me here, with you. I didn't even think twice before going into the water because I feel safer and happier than I have in months and it's all thanks to you."

"Fitz, I don't know what to say, I—"

"You don't have to say anything, I just-I needed to tell you."

And so, she didn't say anything. She gave him another tremulous smile and kissed his shoulder as she snuggled back to his side, even closer than before, and ended up falling asleep with her hand over his heart. And that told him all he needed to know, really.


	6. Chapter 6

In typical Scottish fashion, those last few days of nice, warm weather were followed by an equally terrible one and Jemma's next day off started with a loud rumble followed by an absolute downpour. It didn't look like it would stop anytime soon, which meant they were definitely not going back to the lake, or even out at all. 

Which only seemed to deter Jemma for a minute. Apparently not even considering not spending the day with him, she had come up with another plan before Fitz could even finish his, admittedly huge, bite of muffin. It had only been a week since he told her but she'd already found exercises to help get rid of the last of his symptoms. These days it was mostly the shaking of his hand that seemed to make a comeback every time he got a little nervous. It was an incredibly nice thing she did, dedicating so much of her time to him, especially considering how busy the coffee shop had been getting since that blogger posted a very positive review about it two weeks ago. Although, Jemma being who she was, she'd probably been suspecting what had happened to his brain a while ago and just waited for the right moment to talk to him about it. 

So, right after breakfast, they'd ran back to his place so that they could start working and everything would have been fine by him if his mood wasn't so ridiculously attuned to the weather. His mind had been buzzing with ideas, thoughts and feelings quite a lot lately but now, he felt… electric, for lack of a better word. Which probably wasn't the best moment to work on his calm and ability not to overreact. Especially when Jemma seemed intent on standing or sitting so close to him all the time, sending his already hyperactive brain in overdrive. 

"Ugh, this is useless!" Fitz groaned as he stood up and started pacing. "We should do something else, w-watch a movie or something…"

"Fitz, wait—"

Jemma was cut off by a loud rumble that made them both jump. The wind changed direction and the rain got much louder as it seemed to hit the living room windows almost perpendicularly.

She stood up and grabbed his arm to make him turn around.

"Let's just try something else, okay?"

He sighed and nodded as he looked up at her. He couldn't really refuse her anything when she used that soft tone. 

"Just take my hand and squeeze as hard as you can." 

"What? No, I'll hurt you," Fitz said, taking a step back and she laughed at his horrified expression. 

"Just do it. I'll stop you if I feel any bone breaking," she replied and took his hand before he could protest.

"Oww!" they both cried out in unison as they felt the electric discharge. 

"Sorry!" she said, rubbing her hands together before carefully taking his hand again. "Must be my cardigan."

However big it was, that bloody thing was more distracting than it had any right to be. With the way it fell off her shoulders whenever she moved, it seemed to bring attention to all the lovely exposed parts of her skin more than it covered it. She squeezed his hand lightly to encourage him and he started squeezing back tentatively. 

"Harder," she said, her voice barely audible over the storm going outside.

Oh, for god's sake…

He did as she said and she gave him an encouraging smile.

"That's it," she said. "You see, it's like when you say you work better after you've gone for a run in the morning. It's because when your body's tired enough, it'll start working in automatic mode and do the things you need to do without you consciously telling it to, like keep walking until you've made it home or gotten into the shower."

"Okay…"

He knew what she said probably made a lot of sense but his brain was currently too focused on how nicely their hands fit together and all the nice and very distracting things it evoked to see them holding on so tightly to each other. She seemed to remain unaware and continued her speech. 

"So if your hand makes a big enough effort, it should allow you to get rid of this nervous energy that makes it shake when you try to do something that requires more concentration and— ow!" 

"Sorry!" he cried out, letting go of her hand when he realized he'd been squeezing a little too hard, then immediately taking it back. He opened it carefully, rubbing his thumb over her palms and fingers to see if he'd hurt her and she shook her head. 

"Don't worry, I'm fine. I just hadn't anticipated how strong you could be," she said, smiling. "You have such lovely, elegant hands…" she trailed off. Their roles had been reversed without Fitz realizing it and she was now trailing her fingers from his wrist to the tips of his fingers and sending little zings through his body that had nothing to do with her jumper or the storm outside. 

"But that's-that's good, Fitz," she said, looking up. Her cheeks looked a little pink but maybe it was just a trick of the changing light. "You stopped thinking for a moment. That's what we want to achieve here, let muscle memory do the work. Lots of people would call it instinct, which is not exactly right in these circumstances, but well, you know…"

"Yeah," he replied, his voice low as he fought not to close his eyes in pleasure while she kept running her fingers over his. "I could use it to unplug my brain once in a while and—"

"Let instinct take over," she finished for him.

Another bolt of lightning struck, giving her face an almost supernatural glow and for once, his brain provided just what he needed at the moment. Memories of when they first met, both times, every one of their hugs and evenings spent snuggling on the couch, all the cheek kisses and intense looks exchanged, and his lips were on hers before thunder rumbled.

She whimpered and squeezed his hand harder as she kissed him back without a moment's hesitation. Fitz's heart soared when she parted his lips and lightly sucked on his bottom lip. She was soft and warm and all kinds of wonderful things he'd probably be incapable of saying out loud right now, but most incredibly, she seemed to want him just as much as he wanted her. She let go of his hands and fisted his t-shirt to pull him closer with a strength Fitz hadn't anticipated that made them lost their balance. They staggered together towards the nearest wall and Fitz wound his arms around her waist before she could hit it too hard. They laughed and Fitz noticed how her cardigan had fallen even lower down her arms and he couldn't resist. He pushed it down, easily making it fall to the floor as he diverted his kisses to her jaw towards her neck, smiling when she turned her head to the side to give him more room to work. Her skin was covered in goosebumps already and Fitz decided that it was so much better when he was the one giving them to her. 

He grazed her skin with his teeth and Jemma let out a loud moan that made his hips twitch and push his hard-on against her pelvis. She made a funny squeaky noise and her hands on his shoulder pushed him back a little. 

"I'm sorry, I thought-I didn't—"

"Fitz!" she cut him off, her voice so raspy it went straight to his groin. "Don't stop."

She reached for his hand and put it on her breast, her darkened eyes never leaving his.

Fitz whimpered as his hand flexed around it automatically. She wasn't wearing anything under her dress. She gave him a cheeky grin and what was left of his restraint evaporated. He captured her lips once more and deepened the kiss as his hand had apparently decided to test that muscle memory thing. She pulled him closer, her hands sliding under his t-shirt as her tongue swiped against his. 

A small part of him suggested that maybe they should talk before going any further. That he should tell her how much she meant to him and that he wanted so much more than this and hoped she did too. But then she pushed her hips against his and that voice shut up for good. He had to trust his instincts for once and believe that all that had happened between them really meant something. 

She fisted his t-shirt once more and pulled it up, breaking the kiss just long enough for him to pull it over his head. The soft, playful smile she flashed him then had his heart melting in his chest and he pulled her back to him, one hand in her hair and the other back on her breast. She arched into him when he lightly flicked her taut nipple through the dress and he captured her lips once more, kissing her hard and fast as more and more heat gathered between them. Wanting to even things out, he went for the little buttons on the front of her dress and easily undid them. He broke the kiss then, panting, and she looked confused for a second before he started going down, kissing down her jaw and neck until he reached the swell of her breast. Her dress only opened down to the stomach but that was enough to push it to the side and close his lips around her nipple.

She giggled at first but it soon turned into a throaty whimper when he did that thing with his tongue. He grinned when he pulled back for a second to move to her other breast and she immediately pushed his head back against it. Like he would stop so quickly when really, he could do just that for the rest of the day. Also, it was good to know that what little knowledge he'd gained in that area was coming back to him as easily as driving had.

A rather impressive lightning bolt was followed by very loud thunder and Jemma's hands tensed in his hair, pulling on it involuntarily.

"Ouch!" 

"Oh, sorry," she said, her touch gentler again. "I'll kiss it to make it better."

She grinned and pressed a kiss to the top of his hair before pulling him up and pressing the next kiss to his lips. 

With their bodies pressed together once more, Fitz quickly remembered that, as perfect as they were, he wanted more than her breasts, he wanted all of her and by some sort of miracle, she obviously wanted that too. She started undoing his belt and trousers but with the way she was currently focused on plundering his mouth with her tongue, she wasn't getting much done. So he took over, pulling back slightly as he got it all off and in a heap on the floor in a matter of seconds.

When he looked back into her eyes, she was eyeing him up and down and actually licking her lips. He really hoped it would be more than this one time, but even if it was, he knew that single look would give him an ego boost for years to come.

"Your turn," he said, going for smooth but probably ending up sounding horny and desperate, which he really was.

"If you want it, come and get it," she replied with a cheeky grin. 

Many images of what he wanted at the moment floated in his brain and it made his blood boil with even more desire. He grabbed the hem of her dress without her having to say another word and pulled it up over her head then sank to his knees. He hooked his fingers on the side of her knickers and pulled them down. Her legs were a little shaky as she stepped out of them, making Fitz very proud of himself. He pressed a kiss just above her folds and felt the muscles of her thighs quiver under his hands as her legs parted, of their own volition it seemed. So he did it again and again before finally giving her pussy a long lick from bottom to top before standing up. 

"Fitz!" she moaned desperately right before he captured her lips again. She pushed her hips forward against his erection all while slipping her hand between them to touch him and holding on to his bum with the other. Fitz didn't remember feeling so desired in his entire life and he couldn't believe it was by the most amazing woman he'd ever met. After a minute though, she bit his lip and pushed at his shoulders a little, making him wonder if maybe he'd done something wrong or she'd changed her mind but the look on her face couldn't be mistaken. She kept her eyes locked on him as she sank to her knees. 

"Jemma, you—"

She closed her lips around the head of his cock and slid down. He let out a noise between a groan and a desperate whimper and had to rest his hands against the wall as she started bobbing her head up and down. The rain was still pounding outside and the storm was far from over but it was nothing compared to the beating of his heart or the fire coursing through his veins. She hummed around his cock and he gasped loudly.

"Jemma, wait," he whimpered, fighting against his instinct to let her keep doing just that until he came. It felt bloody amazing but he wanted to feel all of her, to have her in his arms and worship her body like it deserved to be. She let him go with an audible pop and he quickly pulled her up, winding his arms around her waist to kiss her once more. Then, sliding his hands down to her bum, he lifted her up, making her squeal in surprise as she tried her best to wrap her legs around his hips. Fitz turned around and started making his way towards the bedroom, all while still kissing her and having his cock pressed against her folds, but somehow her bum hit the table. 

Before he could do anything, she had moved further towards the middle of the table, resting on her forearms with her legs parted and her feet resting on each side of his hips. She licked her lips as she looked at him once more and his cock twitched. He hoped she was close because he was definitely not going to last very long either way. He climbed onto the table and moved until he was over her, his hips resting between her legs. 

"Oh wait, I don't-I don't have condoms"

"I have an IUD and I'm clean!"

Fitz chuckled as he shook his head disapprovingly at himself. Maybe he should have worried about that earlier. 

"They tested my blood for everything at the hospital. I might be the healthiest man you've ever had sex with." 

"Great. Well I'd love to hear about your blood sugar level or cholesterol but—"

"Yeah, later," he cut her off before capturing her lips once more. Then reaching between them, he aligned himself with her entrance and pushed in. 

She groaned as he did and wound her legs around his hips until he was as deep as he could be.

"Fitz," she whispered into his ear as she pushed her hips up and he got the message loud and clear. He'd found her beautiful and attractive the moment he met her, both times, but now that he truly knew her and after all the pent up tension of the past weeks, Fitz felt like he could burst into flames anytime. 

Jemma slid her hands down to his bum, squeezing firmly and Fitz groaned into her shoulder. She laughed as she squeezed even harder, pushing his cock deeper. 

"More!" she moaned. 

He nibbled the skin of her neck, making goosebumps erupt all over, then pushed up on his forearms and gave a hard thrust. Her eyes fluttered open and her blissed out expression spurred him on. He started snapping his hips harder and faster, too far gone to care how much the table was squeaking. Moaning constantly, she encouraged his movements with her hands on his bum and her legs spread wider on each side of him. Her orgasm came quickly, her back arching into him as she let out a deep sort of whimper and her eyes closed again as she rode out the wave. 

Fitz had done that to her, had made her feel this good, and it triggered an overwhelming feeling of affection and possessiveness like he'd never felt before. He never wanted this to stop or for her not to be in his arms. Before the wave of her orgasm had even seemed to pass, he balanced his weight on one arm and reached between them with his free hand. She squeaked when his fingers found her clit but then he started rubbing circles over it and she whimpered, her hips pushing up against his hand frantically. She came again with a cry of his name that made the rumble of thunder sound like a distant noise. 

Her hands finally left his bum (he thought he might have bruises from how hard she held onto it) and she pulled his face down to kiss him hard. She pushed her tongue between his lips hungrily and he couldn't resist moving any longer. 

Breaking the kiss, he buried his face in her neck and slammed into her with abandon. His thrusts pinning her to the table, she hooked her legs high around his hips, panting in almost perfect synchrony with him. He was so close, he just needed...

Reaching back, he grabbed one leg and hooked it over his shoulder. They both whimpered at the change of angle and on the next deep thrust, he came, groaning as he released deep inside her but kept moving more gently for a moment to prolong the pleasure. He didn't remember sex being this good or wanting someone as much as he wanted her. As the last of his pleasure left his body, he gave one last hard thrust and sank his teeth into the fine skin of her neck, feeling like he could devour her all if he wasn't careful. She didn't really seem to mind though because her thighs quivered and tensed as she gasped and came more quietly this time. 

Finally, they both relaxed and as Jemma wound her arms around his shoulders to pull him close, Fitz thought he might fall asleep on the spot, surrounded by her warmth and intoxicating scent. But he didn't want to crush her so after a minute, he pressed a soft kiss to her lips before pulling back to look down at her. She had a mischievous smile on her face. 

"What?" He asked, his voice still low and a little sleepy. 

"That was ridiculous," she said, her smile growing bigger.

"What? But I thought you-you... multiple times and it sounded like--"

"Oh no, I most definitely did and it was..." Her hand trailed down to grab his bum again and she hummed. "... really lovely. It's just, we have two very comfortable beds in this house and a very nice couch right behind us but we still ended up on this surprisingly sturdy table."

Fitz grinned before pecking the tip of her nose. 

"That's what I was aiming for but you didn't seem too keen on waiting and well, I'm only a man, you couldn't expect me to resist, could you?"

She smiled and lifted herself up to kiss him softly, her lips lazily moving across his as she almost purred in contentment. He could really get used to that. 

"I'm glad you didn't. That was-that was... really something. But what would you say to a bed right now?"

"Nap and cuddles?" 

She nodded eagerly. 

"Sounds perfect."

-0-0-0-

Fitz's mom always liked these kinds of dark and stormy weather because she said it gave a good excuse for a nice cosy day in. Fitz had never really understood or agreed until he found himself in bed, Jemma cuddled against his side as they kissed lazily while slipping in and out of consciousness. 

Jemma sighed contentedly as she stretched out her limbs then sat up to look down at him. 

"I'm glad you finally let your instinct take over, you know," she said, running her fingers through his hair, making it an even bigger mess. 

"So that was what you had in mind when you said that?" he said with a pleased smile. 

"Yes!" she said matter of factly. "Today and pretty much everyday for the past few weeks. At least."

He raised his eyebrows at her and she laughed. He'd certainly felt that there was something between them but he hadn't realized it was so obvious to her.

"Do you think I go about hugging and cuddling all my friends like this?" 

"Nothing wrong with being affectionate." 

"Of course, there isn't," she said as she apparently decided she could use more cuddling and laid back next to him. "I would have made the first move myself but I-I was starting to wonder if maybe you weren't--"

"Don't be ridiculous!" he cut her off as he pulled her on top of him to kiss her properly. Feeling his body react quite nicely to her closeness, he wondered if a third round would be what she needed for him to prove just how much he'd wanted her from the beginning. But to think she'd wanted him as much all along... it was almost dizzying.

"I just... I'm having a hard time believing that _you_ want... this. Me."

"Just look at yourself." 

"No thanks."

She kissed him again.

"You don't believe how attracted I am to you?"

"Oh no I believe you, there's no mistaking the way you tore off my pants earlier," he grinned.

She blushed prettily and his heart melted even more than it already had.

"I just don't understand why. I know it sounds like I'm fishing for compliments but I--"

"No, I know Fitz. I know what it's like to struggle with one's self esteem and I hope I can help make it better. Because I liked you the first time and even before I remembered who you were, when you walked into the cafe, I felt drawn to you. You were so sweet and awkward I wanted to hug you all the time and I-I... your mind shines so bright, even when you can't express everything you want to say."

His heart had now turned to complete mush and there was nothing to be done.

"Jemma..."

"And of course, you're just too damn pretty!" 

He burst out laughing.

"And it doesn't hurt that you have the nicest bum in all of Scotland."

"Okay, now it's getting ridiculous, stop--"

"I'm serious Fitz! My friend told me to find myself a Jude Law while I was here and I did just that. I mean you're Scottish and I'm not American and well, the situation's really quite different actually but well, you know..." 

"I really don't!"

"The Holiday?"

Fitz shook his head. Was he supposed to understand what she was saying? Could too much, too good sex after a very long dry spell fry your brain?

"It's a film, Fitz! You have some serious catching up to do!"

"Sure, whenever. Does it involve getting out of bed and you putting on clothes though? Because I don't see it happening for the foreseeable future."

"Oh really, what did you--"

His hands closed on what he considered to be the nicest butt residing in Scotland at the moment and he pulled her closer. 

"Oh. Alright, then I guess your education can wait a little longer."


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me so long to update this story but Promptober has kept me pretty busy :) I've started writing again so, hopefully, you shouldn't have to wait to long for the next chapters :) 
> 
> Speaking of Promptober, I wrote a short story that takes place in this verse between the previous chapter and this one. This one is written from Jemma's POV and it's just silly, fluffy smut and a peak at Jemma's brain as they'd just gotten together :) Theres's no plot at all so you can skip it or read it later but chronologically, this is when it happens :)  
You can read it [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20990006)

Fitz yawned and rolled over as he cracked an eye open. The sun was high in the sky already and Jemma's side of the bed was completely cold. He must have slept later than he had intended but, to be fair to himself, he'd fallen asleep rather late the previous night. A big smile crept onto his face, an occurrence not so rare anymore, as delicious memories and images flooded his brain. 

It had barely been a week since their relationship had taken on this new turn but since then, they hadn't spent a night, or a day apart. These few hours between the moment she had to wake up to start baking and his own more reasonable wake up time were the longest they stayed apart. Fitz knew Jemma didn't really believe the ridiculous excuses he made up to spend more time at the coffee shop but she didn't seem to mind. She even made up her own so he didn't see a reason to stop. 

There was a knock on the door and Fitz's heart fluttered in his chest. Which made him roll his eyes at how ridiculously romantic he was being. He grabbed his phone to look at the time. He'd seen Jemma less than three hours ago and he was excited to see her again. 

Because of course it was her. Who else could it be? He pushed the covers back and stood up lazily. He'd told her that, even when they slept at "his" place (mostly when they got distracted as Jemma came to help him work after the coffee shop closed), she could still go about as if it was her place. But she insisted on knocking, saying he deserved his own space, which he found unnecessary but very thoughtful and adorable.

Not bothering to put clothes on over his boxers, he quickly walked down the stairs and made a beeline for the door.

"Did you miss meeeeeeeee-- Bobbi!" he cut himself off, squeaking as he felt his cheeks, and the rest of his body heat up, under his friend's gaze. 

"Well, hello there Fitz," she said, her lips pulling into the biggest Cheshire cat grin Fitz had ever seen. "When I said to Hunter it'd be nice to see you, I didn't expect to see so much of you." 

"Bobbi, please... just," he mumbled, his hands coming before him to cover his groin like it wasn't too late and she didn't already have a detailed enough mental image to recreate a second Fitz if they ever needed one. It was too early for this for god's sake. 

Turning around and ignoring her low whistle, he grabbed the sweat pants and white t-shirt he'd been wearing the previous night and that had been discarded on the sofa as they celebrated finding the solution to Fitz's new drone design problem. Fitz didn't know he had such a sex drive until he met Jemma but he couldn't deny that theirs was the superior way of celebrating a scientific success.

"Well the country life certainly seems to suit you. I didn't even know it was possible to get a tan in Scotland," she said, coming to sit on one of the kitchen chairs, her little delighted smile never leaving her face. 

"Bobbi, come on," Fitz whined as he hastily finished pulling his shirt down.

"Hey it could have been worse. Coulson wanted to send May."

Fitz's eyes widened as a shiver ran down his spine at the idea of opening the door half naked to Melinda May of all people. 

"But seriously, you look good," she added, her smile softening.

"Thank you. I feel good. And it's nice to see you Bob," he added, reciprocating her smile, which prompted her to stand up and pull him into a hug, which he didn't hesitate to reciprocate either. 

"I can also tell you kept working out," she said, squeezing his shoulders, and Fitz chuckled. 

"Stop feeling me up, you pervert," he replied and she huffed before pulling back and glaring at him, which only made him grin wider. When he first met her, he'd found her just as intimidating as May and, in another life, he might have continued to do so, but as they started working together, he came to realize that what he felt when she was around was the comfort, slight annoyance and tendency to regress that comes with having an older sibling. So, unlike with May, that he considered more of a surrogate mother to them, not that he would ever tell her that, with Bobbi, he'd quickly started feeling comfortable enough to tease her. 

"So, what brings you here?" 

"You mean apart from overseeing the photoshoot for your nude calendar?" 

"Oh bloody hell…"

"Sorry," she said, grinning in a way that contradicted her words. "Mostly, it's just a courtesy visit, just checking on you. I was around for a mission—"

"Oh, is there something—"

"Nothing to worry about. Just trying to recruit an old contact. Which brings me to the other reason of my visit. I can tell you're feeling much better. Your speech is almost perfect and you would probably pass your field assessment easily now. I've been postponing this for as long as I could but at some point, we're going to need you and you're going to have to make a decision."

Something twisted in Fitz's guts. He might have been physically and intellectually ready but he just didn't like the idea of leaving this place and Jemma, not when they were still at the beginning of something that could be magnificent and not knowing when he'd be able to come back. But he couldn't let his friends go on missions without all the technical help they needed either.

"How long?"

"I don't know. We're trying to recruit scientists but it's hard. With everything that's happened, lots of ours decided it wasn't worth it and thought they'd be better off making more money in the private sector. Not to mention safer. We didn't find anyone that's half as good as you are." 

Fitz's ego swelled up a little at her words as it fought for dominance inside him with his heart. Bobbi must have felt how conflicted he was because she came closer to squeeze his shoulder soothingly. 

"Listen, I'll keep on postponing for as long as I can, I promise, but I need you to be prepared, okay?"

"Yeah," he replied, smiling softly up at her. "So how's everything at—"

He was interrupted by another knock on the door. This just had to be Jemma this time. Unless it was May deciding that he had to come back right now after all.

"Hey, just wanted to check if you wanted me to save you something specific for breakfast..." Jemma's cheery voice trailed off when she noticed Bobbi sitting at the kitchen table. "Oh, hello," she said very politely although Fitz could see a little spark of jealousy in her eyes that flattered his ego. 

"Jemma, that's my hum... colleague from work, Bobbi. And this is my friend Jemma and hu... current hu... landlady," Fitz finished lamely, knowing he'd made a mistake instantly as Jemma's expression turned from jealous to hurt. 

"Oh," she just said, her posture suddenly more rigid as she gave Bobbi what he knew to be a very forced smile, the one she usually reserved for very rude clients.

"I'm from SHIELD," Bobbi said before turning to Fitz. "Remember I'm the one who vetted her. Impressive resume, Jemma, by the way," she added, nodding towards the young woman.

"Oh hum... thank you. And yeah, I kind of figured you were SHIELD, from the accent and the... everything," Jemma gestured towards Bobbi awkwardly. She was indeed rather impressive and had a badass spy vibe to her she could never really shake off.

Bobbi laughed lightly as she looked at them both with an amused smile that Fitz didn't understand. 

"I was checking on Fitz to see if he was getting better." 

"Oh well, I'll leave you two to catch up then. Fitz, you can come and have your breakfast later. Bobbi, you're welcome to it as well, of course."

"Oh wait, Jemma—"

"Cafe opens in twenty minutes, Fitz and there's still a lot to do. See you later, okay?" 

From the look in her eyes, the last sentence was clearly not a question and Fitz knew better than to insist, especially with Bobbi's piercing gaze and annoyingly perceptive personality. 

"Okay, yeah..."

And with that, she was through the door, the gravel crunching under her quick steps for a moment before Bobbi spoke again.

"So that's who you were expecting when you came to open the door half naked?" 

"Wha-what do you mean?"

"Well, I figured it was something like that but now I completely understand why you decided to stay and rent the house and why you insisted on telling the truth to your new friend," she said, air quoting the last word.

"Well, yeah, we've become really good friends and I felt bad not telling her everything when she—"

"Oh please, you're _good friends_ with the beautiful girl who looks at you with stars in her eyes. Well, when she's not glaring at you for being an idiot, that is."

"What do you mean? I don't know why she would—" 

"Fitz!" she cut him off with that low tone that he knew better than to interrupt. "Stop lying, it's embarrassing. Hunter hasn't looked at me that way for ages."

Fitz started protesting again but the words died in his throat before they could come out. He didn't even know why he was trying to hide their relationship. Maybe because he'd always tried to hide the things people could use against him or take away from him. And the whole Hydra debacle had certainly damaged his ability to trust. But Bobbi could probably tell him about a hundred visual cues that betrayed him. And she was a good friend too. She was probably the reason Coulson hadn't asked him to come back just yet. 

"Fine, we're… more than friends and she's amazing, obviously, but it's new. We haven't had the time to really talk about it."

"Well, you better run after her and have that talk now because I don't think she liked the way you introduced her. Friend was bad enough but landlady, honestly?"

Fitz winced. It sounded even worse when someone repeated it back to him. Bobbi's expression softened as she stood up and gently put a hand on his shoulder.

"Listen, from what I read about her, she's even more of a genius than you are and, more importantly, she's making you feel better and happy. You know how rare it is to find someone like that in our line of work?" She didn't wait for his answer as it was more rhetorical anyway. "So go tell her that and be your own adorable self before she changes her mind."

Fitz laughed as he felt his cheeks heat up. Of course, he had to tell her. He'd wanted to do it the first morning he woke up next to her and every one after that. His insecurities were the only things that stopped him. 

"Alright," he said, grabbing the pair of sneakers he left by the door to put them on quickly. "Do you have to go now or…"

"I have time. Come get me when you're done being disgustingly in love and I'll have that breakfast she offered. I read a fantastic review on Yelp."

Fitz nodded and opened the door but turned back as a thought crossed his mind.

"Hunter does look at you like that, you know," he said, remembering how disgustingly in love his friends actually were despite how complicated their relationship was sometimes. "Just not when you're watching." 

"When he thinks I'm not watching," Bobbi corrected with a grin and Fitz shook his head.

"To think I'm taking relationship advice from you guys!"

-0-0-0-

Fitz found Jemma behind the counter when he walked into the coffee shop. Everything was, of course, ready and she was just wiping the already perfectly clean counter with a little more strength than necessary.

"I'm sorry, Jemma," he simply blurted out before she even had the time to notice him. She froze for a second before resuming her vicious wiping. 

"About what? You didn't do anything—"

"Because I introduced you as a friend when it's obvious that you're so much more than that," he cut her off and she finally looked up at him, the hurt still present in her eyes but with something else as well and Fitz took it as his cue to keep talking. He took a few steps forward until he was just on the other side of the counter. "It's just… we haven't talked about it yet, about our relationship and Bob took me by surprise. I'm just so used to keeping everything private and—"

"It's alright, Fitz, I understand," she cut him off, her expression softer now but determined. "So if I'm not a friend, then what am I?"

"I just know that I want to be with you all the time, kiss you all the time, wake up next to you every morning and hold you in my arms whenever I can. And, also, I think, no I know, that I'm falling in love with you. What do you think that makes you?"

"Oh, Fitz," she whispered, voice shaky with emotion before she seemed to make a decision and walked around the counter to crash against him, her arms around his waist. Fitz let out a relieved breath before she even said a word, her actions and the time already spent together telling him everything he needed to know. Still, she looked up at him after a moment, her eyes shining with unshed happy tears. "I love you too, Fitz."

He felt so light he thought he would have flown away if Jemma wasn't holding onto him so tightly. He cupped her cheek gently and pressed his lips to hers in a light kiss, the taste of chocolate and her gentle humming making his heart beat much faster. 

"So…" he said when they pulled back. "We're keeping it casual, yeah?"

Jemma burst out laughing before swatting his chest playfully and pulling him into another kiss. 

When they were done being disgustingly in love, as Bobbi put it, his friend came to share a breakfast with Fitz, telling him how everyone was doing and what she was allowed to say in public about the current missions. Jemma joined them when she had some time and it was nice, more than nice even. Jemma meeting Bobbi was like introducing her to his family, teasing and embarrassing stories included, and Fitz was happier than he could express it that they got on so well together. He always had a feeling they would though. He knew Hunter would like her on the account of her being English, Skye would be won by the muffins. And well, she was witty, smart, a little nerdy and overall adorable, she would make everyone love her in a heartbeat. 

But as Bobbi left, Fitz was reminded that as well as Jemma would get along with his friends, he would eventually end up having to choose between the two.

-0-0-0-

Waking up next to Jemma would never get old but it was even better when it was Jemma's day off and she didn't have to abandon him so early. And since they had gotten together, he'd found ways to even convince her to go running later and stay in bed a little longer. Speaking about those ways, Jemma was currently making the most distracting noises in her sleep. 

Was it possible that she was having... She moaned softly as her body tensed a little against his and the sound went straight to his groin. So she was definitely having a sex dream. 

"Fitz," she mumbled against the pillow and Fitz's lips pulled up into the biggest smile. His beautiful, amazing girlfriend wanted him so much she was having sex dreams about him. Could life get any better than that? 

He ran a finger across the skin of her arm and side, making it cover in goosebumps. Pressing closer against her back, he let his hand slide under her t-shirt and up over her stomach before delicately closing around her breast. There was a small gasp that informed him she was awake now. 

"Morning," he whispered in her ear. "You were moaning in your sleep. I thought I'd wake you up in case it was a nightmare..."

"Mmmh… not a nightmare," she said pushing back against where he was starting to harden. His fingers tightened around her breast and he gently swiped his thumb over her nipple. 

"Oh, sorry… maybe I should let you get back to sleep then," he said as he pressed feather light kisses along her neck but she caught his hand before he had the time to pull it off. 

"Don't you dare," she said, voice still sleepy and a little raspy, before redirecting his hand down between her legs. 

Fitz grinned as he caressed her gently and she released another soft whimper. She extended her neck to press her lips to his lightly and as she pulled back, she let out a throaty "Fitz" that sent a shiver down his spine. Hooking his finger on the side of her knickers, he pulled them down just enough to be able to slip a finger between her folds. She sighed again as her body undulated against his and he started moving, finding her hardened nub and rubbing circles just like he knew she liked. With his lips attached to the back of her neck, kissing and biting every bit of naked skin he could reach, it didn't take long for her to come, gasping as she froze and pressed her body even tighter against his. He continued to touch her through her orgasm, gently rubbing with his thumb as he pushed a finger inside and she came again within a minute, his name coming out of her lips almost desperately before falling back against his chest, panting and sighing contentedly as he wrapped his arm around her. Hopefully, he measured up to the dream version of himself. 

After a long moment of cuddling, Jemma slid from under his arm and, with quite a lot of squirming, she ended up on top of him with her face just inches from him, smiling sleepily. 

"Good morning to you," she said and Fitz's smile grew wider. "Excellent way to practice your fine motor skills, I must say. It's a definite A++."

Fitz laughed, but the next moment, he felt something constrict in his chest because every bit of proof that he had in fact completely recovered was just getting him closer to the moment he'd have to go back to SHIELD. He'd talked about it with Jemma after Bobbi's visit and couldn't come up with a satisfying solution. They loved each other and didn't want this to end but, in the meantime, Fitz couldn't just up and leave SHIELD and his friends at the worst possible moment. The reveal that Hydra had been within for decades had certainly shaken him but he still believed SHIELD was helping people. And whatever he decided, it was a decision that needed time. 

Jemma must have felt his change in mood because she crashed her lips to his, kissing him almost desperately as she rolled her hips against his and scrambled for his clothes. They ended up making love instead of worrying about the future. And in a futile and useless attempt to push back the moment they both dreaded, Fitz didn't do any of his exercises that day. Instead, as the days were already getting shorter and colder, they spent Jemma's day off cuddled on the couch watching Doctor Who and having more sex as they avoided talking about anything SHIELD or work related. And that was why, as busy as they were with each other, that Fitz didn't see Bobbi's text message on his phone until the next morning.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry it took me so long to update this story but I hope you will enjoy this one <3  
I reorganized the last three chapters to make two longer ones. The last one is being written so hopefully, it won't take me too long to post the ending :)   
A big thank you to @libbyweasley for making my words better and to the lovely people who asked for this last chapter <3

"Do you have everything? Did you check the bathroom? And the one in the cottage too? Some of your meds were there the other night, I don't want you to—"

"I did," Fitz cut her off, taking her hands in his to stop her. She'd been running all over the place for the past hour, checking everything after him at least twice. He would have been annoyed if he didn't know she was just trying to keep her mind busy to avoid thinking about him leaving. Just like he had. "And even if I didn't, I'm sure you would have," he said, his tone teasing, and she let out a weak little chuckle. 

"Oh and what about your scarf? It's getting colder these days and I don't want you to catch something and then—"

"I'll be fine Jemma. And I'm sure SHIELD has no shortage of scarves or whatever I might need for the mission." 

She flinched and he could feel her hands tense for a second. But then she forced herself to smile and nod. 

"I'll let you finish packing then," she said before leaving the room. They might try to stall, take an unreasonable amount of time to pack his bag but they couldn't forget the reality that in an hour or so, a car would be there to pick him up and bring him back to SHIELD. He'd be briefed on the mission he was needed for urgently and then, who knew how long it would be before he would see or even talk to Jemma again. A part of him was happy to see his friends again after so long and not helping them when they needed it wasn't an option, but leaving Jemma was making his insides twist. It was all so unfair. Why couldn't he have a normal job where he didn't have to live in a secret base and had time for a personal life? 

He sighed. It was no use thinking about it now. He had to get back to work, complete the mission and then he would think about it. They were geniuses. Between the two of them, they would think of something, right?

It didn't take long for him to finish packing. He took one last look at the bedroom, smiling at the memories he'd made there, then took his bag and closed the door behind him. The sight welcoming him in the living room couldn't help but make him smile. There had to be enough pastry boxes on the table to fill his old bunk on the bus.

"You know, despite what you might have heard, I'm sure SHIELD has no shortage of food either." 

"I know," she said, coming to stand closer. "But as long as you still have some of my muffins left, you can't forget about me."

"Jemma..." 

There was a teasing tone in her voice and Fitz would have taken it as a joke but there was something else in her eyes. Something he knew too well. The fear of being abandoned, forgotten. So instead he let go of his bag and pulled her into his arms, holding her as tightly as he could. 

"I’ve never loved anyone like I love you. I couldn't forget about you in a million years."

"Actually, you kind of–"

"Not again!" he cut her off before pressing a kiss on top of her hair. "I don't plan on having another brain injury. This is not goodbye, Jemma."

He pulled back slightly. 

"We'll find a way to make it work, okay? I don't know how just yet but we will. You won't get rid of me so easily!" 

She nodded as her lips pulled into a small but sincere smile. 

"I love you so much," she whispered against his lips before kissing him and burying her face in the crook of his neck again. 

"Actually," she mumbled against his skin. "My plan was that you share the muffins and they like them so much they want to relocate SHIELD to Perth."

Fitz burst out laughing, falling in love with her even more. He didn't doubt for one second that Jemma's delicious pastries had that power. There was only one problem though.

"Don't be ridiculous. I would never share your muffins. They're all mine!" 

She looked up and kissed him again, winding her arms around his neck so tightly he thought she was trying to make their bodies merge completely. They remained like that for the next hour. Kissing and hugging and speaking only to tell silly jokes. Like a silent agreement to not speak about his imminent departure, like Fitz wasn't going back to work for a secret organisation and they knew when he'd be back.

* * *

The car sent to pick him up was right on time, the wheels on the gravel road doing a good job of bursting the little bubble of denial they'd decided to hide in. He was first surprised to see May of all people get out of the car but then, the other doors opened and Bobbi, Hunter and Skye stepped out, the two of them not even trying to hide their excited smiles as they sneaked a peek through the window. Fitz wanted to roll his eyes at their antics but the truth was that he'd missed them a lot and their curiosity probably came from a place of love and friendship. He knew Bobbi had liked Jemma and she must have been grilled by Hunter and Skye about her.

"Well, let's go see your friends then," Jemma said, standing up and taking his hand to pull him off the couch. She looked equally nervous and happy about it despite it meaning he'd be leaving soon, and it warmed his heart. Apart from his mum, they were the only family he had and he wanted Jemma to love them. 

Fitz barely had the time to walk out of the house before Skye threw herself at him, hugging him with a strength that surprised him. 

"Hey! You've been working out," she said as she pulled back, grinning crookedly. 

"You too, apparently," he replied, giving May a quick glance. The slight quirk of her lips confirmed that not only they were still training together but she was actually quite proud of her apprentice. Not that she would say it in so many words. 

Hunter was the next one to give Fitz a hug, this one just as heartfelt as Skye's and Fitz caught Bobbi's gaze over his shoulder. She had a soft look on her face and it made Fitz smile even wider. These two had something really good and he really hoped that there wouldn't be any more breakups. 

When his friend finally let go of him, Fitz turned back to Jemma to find her trying to hide a grin. 

"What?"

"Nothing," she started. "It's just, it's all so... sweet. Not what I expected from a group of super spies." 

"These two didn't go to the Academy," May answered before Fitz could say anything. 

"Oh, you must be the famous Melinda May. I've heard so much about you!" Jemma exclaimed and Fitz winced. He had indeed talked quite a bit about the members of his team. And even though it was mostly good things, he didn't think May would like it all that much.

May quirked a questioning eyebrow at Fitz. 

"Oh but nothing, you know, top secret or anything," Jemma quickly added. "Just that you were an excellent pilot and hu... oh and that prank with the shaving cream too. That was hilarious!" 

"That was very mean!" Fitz protested. "You don't prank people when they're trying to sleep!" 

"Oh no, it _was_ funny!" Skye insisted. 

Fitz rolled his eyes at her but he could swear he saw Jemma exchange a smile with May. It had taken him days to get that kind of approving smile from her but he was only a little jealous and mostly happy and proud. But it wasn't really a surprise. Jemma was wonderful and no one could resist her for long. 

"So, are you going to remember your bloody manners and introduce us or do we have to do it ourselves? I know we're not famous or anything but–"

"Oh, bloody hell... Like you don't already know everything there is to know about her. Everyone, this is Jemma. Jemma, this is–"

"You're Hunter and you're Skye!" Jemma cut him off, giving them both a big smile. 

"Awww, you told her about us," Skye said, half teasing and half sincere. 

"Yeah, I had to warn her about you guys."

"We drove all these miles for you and that's how you welcome us!" 

Hunter had a very grumpy expression on his face but Skye was still smiling just as wide so Fitz knew she could read right through him. Beside him, Jemma chuckled and wrapped her arm around his waist. 

"He missed you all a lot, he told me so!" 

"Of course, he did," Hunter replied, grinning before taking a conspiratorial tone. "So, tell us everything..."

"Hunter, I know Bobbi told you everything she learned about Jemma!"

"Yeah, yeah. She's a genius, collects PhDs and bakes the most delicious muffins, that's great. What I want to know is what's going on between you two?" He turned towards Jemma. "Is Fitz treating you well?" 

Hunter moved his finger between them while waggling his eyebrows ridiculously and Fitz felt his cheeks heat up. That was ridiculous honestly. He was an adult and he shouldn't feel embarrassed because his friend suggested he'd been sleeping with a woman. He supposed he'd just always been pretty awkward when it came to sharing his feelings with others. It hadn't always ended well. 

"Well Hunter," Jemma started, looking a little taken aback by the Brit's bluntness. "You look lovely but I don't think–"

"That's alright," he cut her off. "Fitz's rosy cheeks tell me everything I need to know." 

"I don't have–"

"Well, this is all... delightful but we really have to get moving now," May interrupted. It felt like a bucket of ice water. 

For a moment there, it almost felt like they were just friends stopping by, meeting his girlfriend for the first time. However embarrassed he was, he kind of liked the interest they were all taking in Jemma and the way she managed so much better than he did under pressure. But Fitz wasn't the only one to react to May's statement. Jemma's hand tightened on his waist and she pressed her body a little closer, like she could stop him from leaving. He wished it was that simple. 

"Okay, yeah... so hum... let's go, I guess." 

Hunter must have noticed his expression changing because his turned softer. 

"Do you need help with your bags?" he asked and Fitz shook his head. 

"That's alright, it's just the one big bag." 

"But there are a few boxes of pastries for everyone on the table," Jemma added softly, nodding towards the inside of the house. 

Skye only took a peek at the actual mountain of white boxes before engulfing Jemma in a hug. 

"I love you already!" she exclaimed and Jemma looked at Fitz over the young woman's shoulder. Her smile was a little weak but sincere. "But seriously, it was great to meet you, hope we'll see each other again soon," she said before giving Fitz what could only be described as bro nod before walking back to the car. 

Bobbi was the next one to give Jemma and Fitz a quick hug. "I'm sorry, I really tried to give you as long as I could," she said for both of them to hear. 

"We know," Jemma said with a soft smile, squeezing her arm before letting her go.

Soon, Fitz's bags and all of Jemma's muffins were in the car, Bobbi pulling Hunter with her to wait in the car and let Fitz and Jemma say their... goodbyes. He hated the word but he had to be honest and admit that it was that, even though it was temporary. 

As soon as the car's doors closed, they fell into each other's arms. Fitz had no doubt that at least Skye and Hunter were watching them but, for now, that was the least of his worries. 

"I love you," Fitz whispered in her ear. At least that was only theirs.

"I love you too," she replied and the slight tremor in her voice almost killed him. For a second, he saw himself running to the car and telling them he wasn't coming back. Ever. But he'd given his word and he was going to keep to it. Just like he would keep the one he'd given Jemma. She pulled back from the embrace, her eyes full of so many emotions. Love. Sadness. Hope?

"Come back to me, okay?"

"I will. Whatever it takes. I promise." 

She nodded and raised up on her tiptoes to press her lips to his. He sighed and just as he expected a sweet, PG-rated kiss, she pressed her body much closer and her tongue swiped at his lower lip before deepening the kiss. His arms wound tighter around her waist as her hands moved into his hair and Fitz melted into the sensation, letting his hands wander over her body. Her warm lips, her tongue and the delightful little noises she was letting out making everything around them disappear. Finally, feeling breathless, but still like it wasn't long enough, they broke the kiss and pressed their foreheads together. Her hands slid down his sides and took his hands that had somehow ended up on her bum. She grinned.

"Jemma... What-what was–That was..."

"So that you don't have to _tell_ your friends anything," she said, pressing one last lingering kiss to his lips. Fitz chuckled and kissed her again, for good measure, before pulling back for good. 

"I'll see you soon," he said and she simply nodded before letting go of one hand, lingering a moment longer before letting go of the other. Fitz only looked back once before getting into the car. 

The car ride was silent for a long moment until Fitz couldn't take the side glances Skye and Hunter kept giving him anymore. 

"What?!" 

"Nothing," Skye started. "Just..." 

"Your hair's a bloody mess, Romeo. What did you do to her to deserve that?" Hunter said, his tone teasing as he reached over Skye to mess up his hair even more. He tried to escape him but Skye grabbed his arm, pulling him closer. 

"Oh, I have a few ideas," she said. "I mean that was a pretty swoon-worthy kiss. I have no doubt our sweet little Fitz deserves all the sugar from his pretty girlfriend, but I've seen him work, I bet he's a very thorough lo–"

"Oh, for god's sake, will you two shut up about it?!" he cried out, trying to look convincing despite his cheeks heating up and his messy hair.

"Sorry..." they mumbled not very sincerely. 

Another moment of silence.

"So, you look like you've made a lot of progress," Skye said after a moment. "Your speech is perfect and you look good. Healthy. Better than I've ever seen you actually." 

"Yeah?" 

She smiled softly. 

"Yes, you really do. And I mean...we can all tell you regained complete control of your hands..." 

Oh god. He was never going to hear the end it. But he didn't care, it was still a hundred percent worth it.

* * *

"You must really love her!" 

Fitz turned around to find Bobbi leaning against the kitchen's doorway with a stupid grin on her face.

"What?"

"You're eating salad when no one's forcing you to."

"So what?"

"You're trying to stay pretty for your girlfriend." 

Fitz rolled his eyes and turned back around to take tomatoes and cucumbers out of the fridge. 

"Isn't that what you're doing when you spend all that time at the gym?"

"Of course it is! But you blush every time we talk about her and it's too adorable not to continue." 

"So nice to be back," Fitz said, flashing his friend a fake smile before getting back to his salad. "And I happen to really like this recipe. It's one of Jemma's and it's delicious," Fitz grumbled as he got to work on chopping vegetables. 

"Proving my point." Fitz groaned and applied himself to chopping tomatoes. "Come on, I'm just teasing. So how's Jemma these days?" she asked, sitting on the high stool across the bar from Fitz. 

Fitz's stomach churned.

"I don't know..." 

"What do you mean?"

"Couldn't talk to her all week. Every time I have a minute to myself, it's the middle of the night in Scotland."

"Fitz," Bobbi said in a voice that forced him to look up at her. "I saw the way she was with you. Trust me, she won't mind if you wake her up in the middle of the night." 

"I don't know... I-I don't want to be a bother, she has to wake up early to bake and I'm not-I don't think it's worth it just talk to me."

"No, no, no," Bobbi said immediately. "You're doing so much better. I won't let you feel like that ever again, Fitz. You deserve all the good things happening to you, including Jemma. Plus, did she give you any indication that she was losing interest in you in any way?" 

Fitz shrugged and Bobbi rolled her eyes. She really hadn't but the more time they spent apart, the more Fitz was losing confidence. It had been three weeks since he left Scotland and the voices telling him he wasn't enough for her to wait for so long were getting louder and louder every day.

"Fitz, three weeks isn't so long. Hunter and I used to spend months without seeing each other but we survived."

"Yeah but you still broke up a hundred times." 

Bobbi chuckled. 

"But not because of the distance and we always found our way back to each other."

"How?"

"One of us would be badly injured and the other would make a grand romantic gesture –usually Hunter– but that won't happen to you." 

"Why is that?"

"Cause I promised Jemma I’d protect you."

Fitz shook his head vehemently. He'd rather stay alive and uninjured but he didn't want any of his friends to take a bullet for him.

"What happened to protecting each other?" 

"That's what we're doing, Fitz. Hunter and I are alive thanks to you. But I promised to keep the bullets and alien viruses away from you and that's what I’ll do." 

Fitz smiled weakly but couldn't stop the shiver than ran down his spine as he remembered the mission he'd been called back to SHIELD for. Coulson hadn't exaggerated when he said they couldn't do it without him. To infiltrate one of the last Hydra bases, he'd had to enter with an unassembled drone of his creation and reassemble it inside to deactivate security. That part had been easy enough but they hadn't anticipated the place would be booby trapped. Without Fitz's quick reaction to launch the new shield function he'd added to his drone, several agents would have been killed by toxic gas, including Hunter, Bobbi and Skye. 

That was when he had decided that being able to do all those things wasn't enough. He needed to teach them to other agents and other scientists fit for the field. A part of him liked being irreplaceable but he liked his friends being alive a lot more. And he wouldn't always be there for all the missions. Coulson had agreed. Fitz was slowly getting results but he was a demanding professor and it was taking time. And a lot of patience. 

"Anyway, what I meant is that, if you really love each other, you'll find something that works for both of you. But you shouldn't keep your fears to yourself. Talk to her and find a solution together."

Fitz smiled, feeling better already. Sometimes, he wondered what would have happened if he grew up with Bobbi as his big sister. Things wouldn't have been so bad. Although, it was probably better he was the only child who had to grow up with his father.

"Yeah. Yeah, you're right."

"Of course," she grinned. "Now, do you have enough of this to share? It looks delicious." 

"Sure," Fitz said, turning around to grab more tomatoes, herbs, bread and olive oil from the counter. If he was sharing then he'd have to make it right or Jemma would never forgive him. 

"Great. Then you can tell me how many lab minions cried because of you today." 

"They don't _cry_ because of me... I think," Fitz said with a grimace. He thought he was doing really good with the whole patience thing all things considered.

"Nah. Some of them are planning your murder though."

Fitz raised his eyebrows. 

"Don't worry, I have all their names just in case."

That night, Fitz waited until it was six on the other side of the Atlantic and called Jemma. She told him everything about her new recipes and he told her what he was allowed about what he'd been working on. Jemma suggested a few modifications for his latest drone and from there they lost track of time. Jemma was late to open the cafe and Fitz was extra grumpy the next morning. But also happier and better than he'd been all week.

* * *

Fitz opened the freezer's door for the tenth time then closed it again. He couldn't believe it. His eyes started to fill with tears and he wiped them before they had the time to fall down his cheeks. It was ridiculous. They were just pastries.

"Everything alright?"

He turned around to find both Hunter and Skye by the kitchen's door. Of course, they had to walk in on him crying over some damn muffins.

"Yeah... fine," he replied, turning back around so they wouldn't see his face.

"You don't look like it, mate," Hunter said, coming to sit on the high stool closest to him. 

"I am, I... it's nothing, it's just... someone ate the last of Jemma's muffins."

"It wasn't me!" Skye blurted out. 

"I know," Fitz grumbled. "You wouldn't have! I bet it's that idiot Nathanson and his stupid face." 

He kicked the bottom of the fridge childishly. 

"Come on, Fitz. Is that really about a muffin?" Hunter insisted. 

"Have you tasted one of them?" 

"I tried," he replied, nodding towards Skye who flashed him a vaguely sheepish smile.

"So come on, what is it?" Skye asked, all trace of teasing gone from her voice as she put her hand on his arm. Fitz's lips pulled up into a soft smile. He hadn't quite gotten used to sharing his problems yet.

"I miss her."

"But you were on the phone last night."

"I know but it... it's not the same. I-I don’t think I’m strong enough to do the long distance thing. I have no idea when I'll be able to see her and it's not like she can visit. It's not gonna work and some day–"

"Then you make it work!" Hunter cut him off. 

"How?"

"You have to find your own way but what's for sure is that you're not giving up on her, mate!"

"Yes!" Skye insisted. "You two are too sickeningly cute and perfect together and I want to be a flower girl at your wedding. Or godmother of your first child. Or both… It's your choice really."

Skye gave a little shrug like it was nothing but Fitz felt an incredible warmth fill his chest. Their faith in his relationship with Jemma meant so much to him. 

That didn't give the beginning of a solution though.

"Listen. Did you think working for SHIELD and living with too many people in an underground basement was my life goal?" Hunter asked, his voice lowering as he leaned across the bar like he was afraid someone was spying on him.

"Hey!" both Skye and Fitz let out in unison. 

Hunter put his hands up.

"Don't get me wrong, I love you guys and Coulson is a terrific boss but you all know I took the job for Bobbi. SHIELD had always been the one thing that was more important for her and that kept coming between us. So when I heard she recommended me, I thought that maybe it was our chance." 

"So when we first met you and you kept talking about your hellbeast of an ex-wife..." Fitz trailed off as a grin spread over his face. 

"I'm not saying our relationship has always been healthy," he grumbled. "It's a work in progress. But we're better now than we ever were." 

"Awwww!" Skye said, tousling his hair and he swatted her hand away. 

"Don't mess up perfection!"

Skye burst out laughing and did it once more. 

"Anyway! What I was saying is that you have to find a way. I'm not telling you to go back to live in Scotland or for her to work for SHIELD but I'm sure you can find a compromise to–"

"Of course!" Fitz cut him off. 

"Of course?" 

"Yeah! You're brilliant! I should have thought of that!"

"I mean I always said so but the idea of compromise isn't exactly revolutionary. You still need to–"

"I have to talk to Coulson!" Fitz said, not waiting a second to bolt out of the room, forgetting about his rumbling belly and the questions his confused friends shouted after him.

Fitz didn't stop running until he was in front of Coulson's office. He had to do it now before he started doubting himself again. He took a deep, calming breath before knocking on the door. 

"Come in," Coulson said and Fitz took one last deep breath before turning the handle and walking in.

"Sir, I have something important to tell you." 

Coulson looked up from his desk and the slight surprise in his expression quickly morphed into one of amusement. And something else Fitz couldn't quite decipher. 

"Ah. I was wondering when you would come. May said it would take less than two months. She was right again, wasn't she?"

Fitz's mouth opened and closed several times. He had the strange sensation that someone had already thought of his genius idea before him. Coulson chuckled. 

"Sit down, Fitz. Tell me everything."

* * *

Fitz took a deep breath as he took in his surroundings. The sun had set already and his breath was visible when it came out. He'd missed the fresh air being only a door away. He loved nothing more than autumn in Scotland, the sound of the wind in the trees and the smell of recent rain. Fitz looked at his watch. 18:55. There weren't any cars parked in front of the cafe so, hopefully, there wouldn't be any customers left.

Fitz turned the handle and walked into the cafe, the little bell above the door announcing his entrance.

"We're closing soon but we still have cakes, coffee and tea to go if you want," Jemma shouted from the kitchen. 

"Okay, then I think I'll have all the cakes," Fitz answered. 

The noise in the kitchen stopped suddenly and a few seconds later, Jemma was barreling through the kitchen door. 

"Fitz," she whispered so softly he could barely hear it. Then once more, louder, and he gave her a shy little smile. 

She ran around the counter and Fitz just had the time to let his small bag fall to the floor before she crashed into him. He felt like he was in a movie with the way their lips fit together so perfectly and his arms wound around her as he lifted her up and made her twirl. She giggled into the kiss as her arms wound around his neck. They broke the kiss when he finally put her back down and Jemma pressed a thousand more kisses to his cheeks and jaw before burying her face in the crook of his neck, sighing deeply. 

"I missed you," she whispered. 

"I missed you too."

They stayed like that a moment longer before they finally pulled back, wearing matching smiles. But Jemma's faltered when she noticed the small duffel bag on the floor. 

"How long are you staying?" she asked, sounding a little sad and resigned at the idea that he probably wouldn't be staying long.

"I don't know," Fitz said, not able to keep _his_ smile from growing. "How does forever sound to you?"__


	9. Chapter 9

"Forever? What? What do you mean? Did you leave SHIELD or—" 

He cut her off with another kiss. 

"Not exactly," he said before taking her hand and leading her to one of the tables. He sat opposite her, taking a deep breath as he gathered his courage by looking into her eyes. 

"I can't leave SHIELD. My friends need me and I still think that's where I can do the most good. And it's been my whole life since I was sixteen...until I met you." Her grip on his hand tightened and she gave him a tremulous smile. "But I can't bear to live without you and long distance isn't a possibility. Not when danger is always so present and I may not even be able to tell you if I'm alive for days. These weeks without you have proven to me that I can't do it. So I told Coulson I would keep working for SHIELD but only as a consultant. From Perthshire. Here specifically. If you'll have me."

"Fitz," she let out in a whisper. "What did he say?" 

"I didn't leave him a choice," he replied with a little grin. That was bending the truth a little but it sounded better like that. 

"And that's not all. Just please, let me say it all now and just think about it, yeah?" She nodded and he took a deep breath before continuing. "Alright, maybe I'm wrong but, during the last few weeks I was here, I felt like you missed science more and more. So I talked to Coulson about you and your reputation precedes you. Turned out he had anticipated things and sent May to get her opinion of you. She liked you. Obviously. Which means that if you wanted to, you could be a consultant as well. I know you love the cafe so it could be part time or just a job once in a while or not at all. I know that's a lot to talk about and a lot of changes. We could transform _my_ house into a lab and live in the cottage together. Or I could live over the lab on the second floor and keep renting the place from you. And whatever we did, neither of us would have to work on anything we're not comfortable with. I know it's a bit much when we've been together for such a short time but I love you and I've never been more sure of anything in my life. For now, I can keep working from _my_ house if you don't mind me adding a little security so please, just take the time to think about and I'll be fine, whatever you decide so don't—"

Leaning over the little round table, she cut him off with a kiss, her hand coming to cradle his cheek as she hummed softly against his lips. 

"That was a very long speech," she said against his lips, voice teasing. 

He opened his eyes and chuckled. "And not a single stutter." She grinned.

"I'm so proud of you. And I love your idea. But why didn't you call?" 

Fitz shrugged.

"It was more romantic this way and I missed you too much, I didn't want to wait."

"Oh Fitz…"

She moved her chair so she could be next to him and took his hands. 

"Listen. I'm going to have a lot of thinking to do and a million questions for you but there's one thing I can already say for certain: Don't you dare live anywhere else than in the cottage with me!" she finished, poking his chest to punctuate her words.

Fitz's smile threatened to split his face in two. 

"I've missed you so much," she let out in a heavy breath before moving to kiss him again. There was nothing else to be said at the moment so Fitz melted into it, deepening the kiss as he pulled her closer. He'd missed this so much. Holding her, sleeping with his arms around her, working side by side or simply knowing that she was just a hundred feet away if he wanted to see her face. The kiss grew in intensity as Jemma moaned against his lips, her hands gripping his shoulders as his slid down to her hips. He pulled her closer and closer until she moved into his lap. But then she broke the kiss and Fitz whimpered, looking up at her in confusion until she stood up and took his hand to pull him up. 

"It's been a while since we last broke health code rules," she whispered against his lips and Fitz smiled as a zing of lust coursed through his veins. Only Jemma could make a line like that sound sexy. 

She gave him a devilish grin before pulling him towards the kitchen but he caught her by the waist before they could get to the door and pressed her against the counter, capturing her lips in a urgent kiss as he swallowed her delighted giggles. Her hands slid down and she palmed his arse, making his hips twitch against hers. 

"Jemma," he mumbled as he broke the kiss to nuzzle at her neck instead, pressing open mouth kisses on the delicate skin of her shoulders, her collarbone and her sensitive pulse point. 

"Fitz," she sighed as her hands moved to his front and she started undoing his belt. But she had barely gotten to his zip when they heard the distinctive noise of a car, or in this case several, on the graveled path. 

Fitz groaned as he reluctantly pulled away from her, straightening his clothes and trying to think of anything other than Jemma's wonderful curves and intoxicating scent so close to him. 

"Fitz?" she asked, looking dazed and her voice still breathy.

"It's the team. I told them to wait for me to call them to bring the rest of my stuff." She smiled and nodded as she started straightening her own clothes. "But apparently no one takes me seriously!" 

Jemma chuckled as she took his hand again and led him towards the door. "That's alright, there'll be plenty of time to violate the health code later." 

"Jemma!" Fitz whined but followed her anyway.

"And it'll be nice to see everyone again. Oh! These two are new," she said as his friends all got out of the cars. 

"The giant is Mack, genius mechanic and pretty much a teddy bear. The one in the tie, currently sniffing your roses is actually the director of SHIELD."

Jemma raised an amused eyebrow before opening the door and taking a few steps forward to welcome them all. 

"So when I told you to wait for my phone call, you just—"

"You were taking too long," May cut him off and he was pretty sure there was a knowing smirk on her face as she gave him a quick once over.

Coulson moved closer and giving her a bright smile, extended his hand towards Jemma. "Hi, I'm Phil Coulson and you must be Dr. Jemma Simmons?" She shook his hand and nodded. "I've heard so much about you."

"So have I," she replied and he raised an eyebrow. "Only good things." 

"So, we have lots of things to discuss and a possible contract to sign but first, I've been told there'd be cake."

* * *

"Are you ready? Come on, it's late already!" 

"Fitz! It's not even eight," Jemma said, shaking her head in amusement as she finished tying her shoe laces. "I think it might be the first time ever you're up and ready for the day before I am!" 

Fitz chuckled. He was admittedly very excited for today and he couldn't wait to know what Jemma thought of the lab and to work with her on their new project. 

"You know I've worked with you in the lab before, right?"

"I know! But you haven't seen the latest modifications and it's the first time you'll spend all week with me. Am I not allowed to be a little excited?" 

"Of course you are," she said standing up and coming to stand closer to boop his nose. "And it's adorable." 

He rolled his eyes before taking her hand. "So? Ready?" She barely had the time to nod before he was putting his scarf around her neck, pulling her outside and all but running towards the lab. 

It had been four months since Fitz had moved into the cottage with Jemma and a lot had happened since. There had been a lot of catching up in the first weeks but also a lot of discussions about their relationship and future together. But also about Jemma's café, the lab and the contract Coulson had given her that still lay unsigned at the time. Jemma did miss science but she'd been burned once and even though she trusted Fitz, it was a different thing entirely to trust a whole organization, especially one that had gone through so much lately. 

Finally, after another long night spent talking and eating leftover pastries from the day, she had finally decided to sign it. On a trial basis. She still loved working at the café and trying out new recipes so, for a time, she only came to the lab on her days off or in the evening when she was especially inspired by some of the things Coulson had asked of them. But as time passed, she started spending more and more time in the lab as Fitz added new features almost every week. And a few weeks ago, she came back from closing the café one night and announced that she wanted to hire someone so she would have more time with him in the lab. The café was doing very well now so a waiter to help her wouldn't be too much even on the days she wasn't in the lab at all. Plus, with the extra money from SHIELD, she could easily afford it. Barely listening to her list of very reasonable arguments, Fitz had been so happy he had literally picked her up from the ground and he could still hear her delighted squeaks and giggles. She wasn't quite as happy when Coulson insisted they do a background check on the candidates who applied for the job but she had to admit that given their situation, it was probably safer that way.

And knowing Jemma would be here more was what had prompted Fitz to do a whole new series of modifications that would make their lab more agreeable to her.

"So? What do you think?" 

Jemma walked in, trailing her fingers over her new desk before something seemed to catch her interest and she moved towards the other side of the room. Fitz grinned and followed.

"Is that—"

"A holotable, yes," Fitz finished for her and Jemma's eyes widened like a kid in a candy store. He pressed his index finger on the side and the latest design he'd been working on appeared. "It's synchronized with both our computers. We just have to synchronize it with your voice and digital print and you'll be all set up." 

A grin was threatening to split her face in two so Fitz asked again, even though he was pretty sure of her answer.

"So, do you like it?"

She shrugged.

"It's alright."

"Alright?" Fitz repeated, raising a disbelieving eyebrow. 

"Mmmmh."

He moved closer. 

"Just alright?" he asked, his hand sneaking under her jumper to tickle her side and she bit her lip not to laugh. She nodded. He pressed closed and moved his fingers lightly until he found her super ticklish spot and she surrendered, bursting out laughing as she grabbed his hands and wrapped them around her waist instead. 

"It's beautiful Fitz and I love it. We're going to make incredible things in here."

Fitz's heart melted at the love and adoration he could see in her eyes. He would do anything to make her look at him that way for the rest of his life. Pushing a strand of hair out of her face, he brushed his lips over hers. She kissed him back eagerly and as her body pressed against his, he felt the heat Jemma always so easily ignited inside him. His hands started to slowly descend towards her bum but Jemma stopped him before he could reach his destination. 

"We should stop now," she said, a little breathless. 

"But you said we were going to make incredible things," Fitz protested and she smiled.

"I meant science." 

"Biology _is_ science."

"Come on," she said and he kissed the tip of her nose before stepping back and moving to his desk. "Plus, I made a bet with Skye that I wouldn't be distracted in the lab!"

"Haven't you lost that bet already? And also…do you really have to talk to Skye about those things?" Fitz asked, grimacing at the idea of his nosiest friend knowing so many private things about him.

"Oh Fitz, that's what friends do! And technically, I haven't lost the bet because we were only talking about today because of all the…sexy new lab equipment," she said, waggling his eyebrows and Fitz rolled his eyes.

"Uh fine…I suppose I'll be able to turn down the charm for one day, for the sake of the bet." 

Jemma grinned as she sat and turned on her computer. "And I'll try to keep my hands off you… Uh Fitz?"

"Yeah?"

"There's an email from Coulson and I'm afraid the new I.C.E.R we're working on will have to remain an Icer and not a "Freezer"." Fitz sighed. Why did no one ever appreciate his talents for naming? "But he is open to different names for the new Dwarf if it's as good as you say it is."

Fitz rolled to the side to look at her.

"Think he means it?" 

She gave him a bright smile.

"I'll hold him to it." 

"Well then, let's get to work."

* * *

The sky was breathtakingly beautiful tonight. There was a gorgeous crescent moon high in the sky and as Fitz's eyes got used to the dark, more and more stars became visible. It was so quiet here in their little piece of heaven in the middle of nowhere that given a little more time, he could probably see the milky way. They could even pack a thermos of tea and plenty of blankets and go stargazing tonight. Fitz smiled.

"So that was your plan all along?" Fitz said towards the cosmos, thinking of how he had ended up stranded on the side of the road all those months ago, forced to walk into Jemma's café and ask for help. "Sorry I ever doubted you."

"What are you doing?" Jemma asked, startling him as she wrapped her arms around him from behind. He'd been so lost in thoughts that he hadn't even heard her close the lab and come closer. 

"Talking to an old friend."

There was a pause and then she chuckled and kissed his cheek. "I love you, you little weirdo," she said, her tone soft and tender.

Fitz turned around and pulled her close. Jemma wasn't quite used to winter in Scotland yet and Fitz was always happy to warm her up. "What's the plan for tonight?"

"Nice dinner and going to bed early?"

"Are you tired?"

"Not at all." Fitz raised his eyebrows and she gave him a big mischievous smile. "I um…I thought we could start practicing on making that family we talked about…" 

Fitz's heart threatened to jump out of his chest with happiness. 

"Really?"

She nodded and he pulled her a little closer. Fitz had thought he should propose to her first, do things in the right order, but the thought of a family with Jemma filled him with such joy that all those things didn't really matter. And anyway, it was only a matter of weeks now before he could get the ring from his mother.

"Do I have a chance of convincing you to take a long nap before dinner?" 

She brushed her lips softly against his.

"You might. Home now?" 

"Home."


End file.
